The Nation

Father’s Day Brownie Points Obliterated As Degenerate Reserve Grader Heads To Mad Mondy In A Tutu

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A plumber from Betoota Heights has taken a metaphorical cheque to the bank today. Bradley Fester (32) has done so by cashing in all of the brownie points accrued from father's day and his birthday last week, and set off down to the Johval (Sir Joh Oval) for a big day in the sun. The occasion is the...

LNP To Unveil Own Shitty Olympics Plan If They Can Get Elected By Rubbishing Every Other Proposal

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Queensland Labor government are still pulling teeth over this weird decision pandemic-era decision to host the 2032 Olympics in Brisbane. With 7 years to go, and not one shovel breaking ground, the only thing that has been confirmed is these games will be not be held in a brand-new stadium. As the window to actually give the inner-city a...

Liberals Actually Kind Of Worried About Albanese Sliding In The Polls And Dutton Not Moving Up

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Prime Minister Anthony Albanese’s approval rating as the preferred prime minister has plunged once again to where it was before he surprised everyone by winning election in 2022 This comes after a noisy week of trade union protests and the emergence of the Greens as a viable candidate for the working class. According to the Newspoll survey, the major parties...

Launceston Pleads With Mainlanders To Stop Giving McNuggets To Their Famous City Park Macaques

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The city of Launceston has issued a public plea to visitors, particularly those from the mainland, asking them to stop feeding McNuggets and other fast food to the beloved Japanese macaques at City Park. The plea comes after a spate of incidents where the monkeys were fed McNuggets, a processed chicken snack from McDonalds,...

This Week On Betoota Talks We Chat To Bernard Fanning And Paul Dempsey About Their New Project, Indian Doofs And Tales From Touring Australia

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT https://open.spotify.com/episode/6CPiAFqrFTPH8gG39na52r?si=ebL1LrMET2OCvqnMSr9R8g

CFMEU Momentarily Pause Protest To Wolf Whistle Young Mums Returning From School Run

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Brisbane mother unwittingly found herself in the middle of a chaotic scene during the afternoon school pickup today, reportedly leaving her with quite the earache. Hearing the angry chants of workers at roughly 3pm this afternoon, Stacy Loughmann, 32 tells The Advocate that she’d simply chalked it up to another one of those vegan protests when she found...

Cooker Parents Avoid The ‘Indoctrination’ Of Schools By Homeschooling Kids With YouTube And No Mates

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A couple of young trailblazers have today spoken to The Advocate about navigating the modern world. In a sit down with our humble regional newspaper young parents Hugo and Isla have given an eye-opening insight into raising kids in a day and age where misinformation is rife, and education is politicised. Living on some acreage on the edge...

Renewables Sector Insist We Need More Wind Turbines To Justify This Shit House Windy Weather

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The renewables sector has this week come forward with a fresh pitch to the Australian public. With the chain still being dragged by various levels of government and business who are not fully set up to maximise their profits on the clean energy boom, the sector has offered up a new angle - cashing in on this fucking...

NSW Rolls Out New Random Detection Cameras To Stamp Out Nose-Picking Behind The Wheel

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Drivers in New South Wales will now face fines for picking their noses behind the wheel as the government rolls out new random detection cameras across the state. The initiative, called "Operation Clean Up" is designed to catch and penalise drivers for what authorities are calling a distracting and unhygienic habit. "These cameras are about...

Hangry Woman Considering Breaking Off Friendship After Mate Insists On Lining Up For An Hour To Try This Place

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactWhat was supposed to be a fun outing has turned into a test of patience and friendship for two women today, as the increasingly popular café, "Kitsune Kafe," proved too much to handle. Betoota Heights local, Samantha Lewis, 32, was visibly irritated as she stood in line with her friend, Jenny Potowski, outside the trendy café that has taken...

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