Office NPC Punches Monitor After Failing To Secure Bruno Mars Tickets
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Some guy that works in town with a computer in return for money has
Office NPC Punches Monitor After Failing To Secure Bruno Mars Tickets
ERROL PARKER | Editor-
Word Of The Week: Fredagsbar (A Popular Danish Tradition Of Friday Drinks And Socialising)
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet
New Apple CEO Finally Vows To Get Rid Of "Sent from Iphone" From Email App
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements
Latest
Roosters Fans To Allow Rabbitohs To Call Allianz ‘Home' Just This Once
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT Long standing geographical feuds are expected to be put aside this week, as the
Canavan Outs Himself As A Steiner Advocate After Claiming Boys Are Sick Of Being Lectured By Teachers
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Nationals Leader Matt Canavan has raised eyebrows around the country this week. Across the nation and
Nice Bottle Of Scotch For Fathers Day Confirms You Can Put A Price On Dad
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local father of three has today dispelled a long held scientific theory that a father’
Betoota Dolphins 4th Grade Captain Reminds Team Ahead Of Tomorrow's Grand Final That This Is What They've Been Working Towards All Season
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact In a little over 24 hours time, 20 men have their date with destiny.
Broncos Win Race For The First Team To Touchdown In Bali
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT In good news for Brisbane Broncos fans, the team has won something this season,
Tomato Inside Toastie To Maintain Steady 5.5 Trillion Kelvin And Continue To Threaten The Collapse Of Universe
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local ham, cheese, tomato toastie has entered its third hour of thermal instability
Local Woman Struggles To Sleep Knowing Gen-Z Could Bring Back Fedoras Any Day Now
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT A 32 year old woman from Betoota’s flight path district is spending everyday living in
Jetstar On Standby To Evacuate Eels, Dragons and Tigers To Potato Head Beach Club
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A Jetstar Boeing 787 Dreamliner is sitting idle on the north runway at Sydney
Local News
Sweet Summer Child: Mate From Sydney Insists On Leaving An Hour Early To Find A Park
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT A Sydney man is currently experiencing his seventeenth wave of culture shock after landing in Queensland
Local Woman Trying To Enjoy Discreet Takeaway Dinner Subjected To Needlessly Identifiable Bag Of Shame
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT A woman in Betoota’s french quarter feels privacy is no longer a right but instead
Suburban Mega Pub Has Definitely Never Served A Beer To Anyone As Hot As The AI Chick In The Flyer
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With a playground for the sugar-high kids and 800 exciting poker machines, The Elephant'
Kid With A Teacher Mum Knocks Book Week Out Of The Park Again
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT Remy Matthews' arrival to school this morning has left all the other kids in Ms
The Nation
Report Finds That 90% Of Husbands Think Louis Vuitton And Louboutin Are The Same Brand
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Report Finds That 90% Of Husbands Think Louis Vuitton And Louboutin Are The Same Brand That
Range Rover Owner Not Happy That Every Other 4WD Looks Exactly The Same As His Baby Nowadays
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Every second 4WD vehicle now looks like a Range Rover, that's according to a
Corporate Tower Lift Now Permanently Stinks Like The Fruity Stench Of Modern Finance Bros
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The corporate elevator now smells like a fusion of grape, mango, lychee, peppermint and apple. That&
Anyone Wearing These Pervert Glasses Needs A Hiding, Says Mainstream Australian Society
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A new boom in 'Smart glasses' and other discreet recording devices has caused extreme
World News
Drunk Man Receives Unabridged History Of Pakistan After Asking Uber Driver His Thoughts On Imran Khan
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT A drunk man with a surface level knowledge of Pakistan's history has just received
Farewell Dolly - An Icon For Rural Communities, Feminists, Rednecks, Gays, The Poor And The Glitzy
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Dolly Parton, the American country music singer who rose from rural poverty in post-war Tennessee
Never Ending Euro Heatwave Forces Spaniards To Push Back Dinner Even Later
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT The never-ending European heatwave has forced Spaniards to push their already notoriously late dinners even
Veteran Tour Guide Delivers Weirdly Sexual Joke In The Middle Of The Day To Complete Silence
VICKI DERWENT | Lifestyle | CONTACT Attendees of a walking tour in Amsterdam were left standing in silence after an aging tour
Politics
After 20 Years In Parliament, Barnaby Reveals Immigrants Are To Blame For His Hometown Of 70,000 Not Having A Heated Pool
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The political establishment are on notice. One Nation have officially won two lower house seats. One
Perth's Filthy Bogans Vote Against Own Interests By Electing One Nation Over A Parachuted Gas Lobbyist
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT RACISTS! One Nation has scored a historic win in Western Australia, securing its first lower house
4Corners Reveals Democracy Now So Compromised That Lobbyists No Longer Need To Operate In The Shadows
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT A recent Four Corners investigation has revealed that we have finally reached the point where political
Victorian Premier Rocks A North Face Jacket As He Orders Every Bird In Melbourne To Be Caged For 300 Days
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the bitter winter climate continues to depress, Victorians could not be more primed to once
Sports
So-Called Rabbitohs Fan Hasn't Even Gotten On The Piss Down The Newmarket
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A bloke that spends a lot of time reading novels - in the most visible corner of
Sydney Swans Cautiously Decide Against Launching Into An Out-Of-Control Bender At An Extremely Indiscreet Venue In The Centre Of A Major City To Celebrate Round 24 Victory Over Mighty North Melbourne
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Sydney Swans have secured their second place on the AFL ladder this week, as the
Sporting World Shocked To It's Core As New Breaks That This Silly Bugger Might've Had A Bump In Majorca
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The entire planet's sports media ecosystem is at a standstill today. The unthinkable has
Report: Bring Back The Fat .....
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Cameron Smith, the champion Maroons and Storm number 9 has ruled himself out of the running