ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A report commissioned by the nation’s peak scientific body has found that the bloated old Pommie fuckheads in the Marylebone Cricket Club (MCC) that abused members of the Australian cricket team in their fancy room can have a fucking sook.
Earlier this morning local time, the Commonwealth Scientific and Industrial Research Organisation (CSIRO) published the short study which has since been ironically criticised by the MCC as being “classless”.
Speaking to The Advocate today, Professor Glen Rutman from the CSIRO explained that Alex Carey did nothing wrong and poor man’s James Graham needs to learn to ground his bat before he goes for a stroll up the wicket.
“Those old Poms in the long room at Lords, where do I even start,” he said.
“Imagine getting abused by some red-faced old goon that’s one big sneeze away from a stroke. They can go have a sook. It’s not like England are the moral high ground when it comes to everything. Stuart Broad embraces being called a cheat. If anyone on that team has earned the right to sling mud, it’s that Ben Stokes. He just said it wasn’t on but who cares,”
“He’s a Kiwi Gemini. He is a sook but he’s a tough sook. Mate, the Poms can learn a thing or two from Big Ben. Without him, they’d just be a Tongue and a Root.”
The Advocate reached out to the MCC for comment but they’re sleeping.
More to come.
