LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Carbs have been given the flick in the most useless way possible as a Betoota man tries to sort out his diet using his complete lack of nutritional knowledge.
Known for cracking the record for most Betoota Subway membership cards owned, George Latore of Betoota Ponds has decided he is being healthy this coming year but for absolute reals this time.
Living in a post weight loss reality show world, Latore doesn’t have a whole lot of options when it comes to losing weight apart from the endless amount of weight loss trends that want a good chunk of your money and personality.
And so, Latore is drawing on his ancient health knowledge taught to him by a giraffe in a caravan to make some of the strangest dietary choices possible.
“Loaded fries thanks, hold the fries,” stated Latore while at his local pub, acting like he was an American or some other radically picky kind of diner.
“Two forks as well please.”
Sitting down with a low carb beer and a plate of melted Trump-approved slop, Latore explained to our reporting team how loaded un-fries are his favourite low-carb pub grub option.
“They load them up with so much stuff I don’t even miss the fries to be honest with you.”
“These shit on naked hotdogs and chip-free nachos.”
Latore then asked our reporting team if he could have some of our chips, just a few to dip in his fryless load.
