KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACT
A long airport queue has been given some colourful entertainment today, as a group of footy boys publicly annouce all the depraved shit they got up to this weekend.
At 4:55pm this afternoon, The Advocate understands passengers waiting to pass through airport security at Coolangatta were treated to a play-by-play narration of all the antics of a Betoota Dolphins footy trip.
Standing smack bang in the centre of a winding snake of fellow passengers, it’s believed nine hooligans from the Dolphins decided that the departure terminal was a good place to air their dirty laundry, which is particularly soiled after a few nights tearing through the Gold Coast.
“Oi Hogga, did you text that stripper from Toy Box?”, chortled Mac “Donga” Donaldson, a reserve grader who had arranged most of the trip and funded the security deposit on the hotel in Surfers.
“We saw ya trying to get her number bro, haha!”
Giggling and sniggering as they waited to be scanned through the X-ray machine, it’s alleged the cackles grew louder when one player, Tyson Vince-Kennedy, was forced to jump the queue barrier and make an emergency stop at the bathrooms to flush some contraband.
“Fuck, reckon that machine will pick-up the… stuff”, Tyson asked, sweat forming on his forehead.
“Boys wait for me at the gate!”
Cackling as their hungover mate tripped and tumbled over the ropes, the gang of shithead mates from West Betoota decided to make everyone else’s transit through Coolangatta a little more uncomfortable, by publicly declaring one of their mates got arrested over the weekend.
“Hahahah, Tyson is cooked aye!” laughed Donga.
‘Has anyone heard from Brommo yet, wonder how long til the cops let him use his phone?”
“Yeah, he texted me and said he’s got the date set for next month, guess he’s coming back to the Goldy!” laughed halfback Jaxson Davies, sporting a fresh midnight eyebrow shave.
“Oi Hogga, text Misty from Toy Box, she might know a lawyer who can get him off for possession…”
“Hahahahahaha!”
More to come.
