EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

In a tale as old as time, local bloke Alan Flemming, 36 has today found himself struggling to decipher his doctor’s handwritten note, after also failing to understand what the doctor was saying to him.

Unlike clinics stationed in the more metro areas in Betoota, ‘The Ponds Medical Centre’ opened in 1902, has failed to enter the 21st century, with all patients still being recorded in a manual filing system, and no doctor under the age of 75.

As someone who is loath to book an appointment at the best of times this ordinarily would not be a problem for Alan, but after suffering some serious inflammation and joint pain for several months, he now seeks an answer.

Only to be left feeling more confused than ever.

Showing our reporter a handwritten prescription he received from Dr. Phillips, Alan says he’s struggled to work out if the doctor is diagnosing or insulting him.

“Do you reckon this says gunt or gout?’, asks Alan, pointing to a barely legible scribble.

“…I suppose it’s the same thing, isn’t it?”

More to come.

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