WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The geniuses in charge of our economy and political system are today coming to terms with quite a grim situation.
Despite being in charge of all their fancy formulas and completely across how the economy should be run to ensure everything adds up, Australia is staring down the barrel of a recession.
This comes as the unemployment rate looks to keep on rising, with 100,000 families are set to be down an income earner so the numbers people at the reserve banks, government and big firms can hit their ‘optimum unemployment rate.’
On top of that, with interest rates punishing poor and middle class people because the geniuses can’t get a handle on inflationary pressures caused by things like energy/petrol/grocery/service price gouging and unchecked corporate profits, the country is looking set to go into a recession.
While we’ve avoided this for a fair chunk of time because we’ve let companies dig an absurd amount of shit out of the ground and give us a little scrape on the side – it looks as though the country has pretty much run out of things worth money to dig out of the ground.
“Yeah, and because we let these mining magnates get to powerful and knee cap the transition to green energy cause it didn’t benefit them at that point in time, we’ve got nothing else to pick up the slack of the fading resources boom,” said local economist Saul Kohler from South Betoota Polytechnic.
“And we never bothered properly taxing the resources companies, or setting up an actual functioning sovereign wealth fund for our resource blessed country,” he sighed.
“So while Norway has a couple of trillion in theirs and Saudi Arabia, Qatar and Abu Dhabi are building futuristic cities and buying football teams for fun, we’ve got a fucked housing market and millions living below the poverty line.”
“At least Queensland’s getting cheap rego and 50c train tickets for a couple of years after finally deciding they should get some royalties out of the companies pillaging their state.”
“But, yeah, we don’t have anything notable to dig out anymore and we couldn’t be bothered regulating things like the gas industry who are robbing us and sending it overseas, so we are kind of fucked.”
“If only Twiggy and those guys were ready to cash in on the green energy boom, but they are still a couple of years behind and hoping for the taxpayer to pay for their infrastructure.”
“Bummer.”
“I guess it’s two minute noodles the shitty old Kmart fan in the next heat wave.”
More to come.
