KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
Lying flat on the couch with ugg boots on and Selling Sunsets playing idly on the TV, local girl Bianka Granger (24) would say she’s back in her element.
After having a pretty intense psychology session this afternoon, one which her therapist would call “a breakthrough”, Bianka has reportedly decided to recover from the emotionally taxing day by putting the snorkel on and diving deep into the fcked up corners of TikTok that dissolve brain cells.
Now into her 5th session of cognitive behaviour therapy, Bianka’s learnt that the soul crushing weight of sitting on a couch and offloading every thought on her mind to a total stranger, means she’s a bit of a zombie afterwards, and needs to do something kind to herself afterwards to wind down.
But rather than going for a walk outside, journaling or practicing some mindful meditation, today’s Bianka’s decided to completely wipe everything she’s just learnt about herself and the way her brain works, by drilling six hours of TikTok uninterrupted.
“Yeah my session today was… it was.. Helpful! And.. OMG have you seen this guy?”, Bianka said to The Advocate, as her eyeballs continued to fry from the barrage of brainless content.
Despite blowing a cool $250 on the 50 minutes with Dr Heather Strause at Millennial Mindset Health, a cool new-age psychology joint that hosts monthly yoga seminars, Bianka’s decided the best way to spend her time tonight is go deep into the earth’s core of TikTok and watch the kind of videos that microdose her with enough dopamine to max out the neurons in her head.
“Yeah the sessions are definitely helping me concentrate more,” said Bianka, as a goop of drool began to slowly drop onto her shirt. “Mmmm I’m feeling very demure, very mindful…”
