CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Local straight man Big Troy can’t believe some of the wild remarks his girlfriend’s gay best friend has been getting away with.
While tagging along on one of their weekly coffee dates, Troy says he was blown away by some of the remarks he heard Ted throwing around in front of his partner of three years this morning.
“Obviously the context is a bit different coming from a flamboyant homosexual florist,” he says. “But never in my life would I even dream of saying ‘shut up you bitch’ to Leesa,”
“She’d hold on for that kind of thing for two months and kill me in my sleep.”
Troy says he was aware of Leesa and Ted’s unique friendship well before he sat through the two and half hour ‘catch up’ this morning, but points out that their gossip-fuelled exchange of insults were much more noticeable today.
Given the unnecessary earful he had received from his girlfriend after politely asking her to ‘hurry up’ before leaving the house earlier.
“Different courses for different horses I guess” says Big Troy.
“Ted greeted Leesa this morning by telling her that she looked like a slut.”
“Then he told her that she was stupid for not remembering the name of his ex-boyfriend. She just responded by saying ‘shuttt up’ and kept giggling,”
“I mean, he’s obviously quite a hoot, but some of his chat is pretty red hot… ”
After being shot several death stares by Leesa upon the suggestion that maybe it was time to wrap up their coffee date and start running the errands they had planned following this appointment, Troy says Ted referred to him as ‘mouth-breathing cave man who was always in a hurry.’
Ted’s comments were met with a giggling reception from Leesa.
“I just had to cop it,” says Troy.
“If I even tried to join in on their ‘banter’ I would have left them both in tears. ‘Oh shut the fuck up’ just sounds different coming from a mouth breathing cave man”
