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The Foreign Minister’s office has devised a plan so crazy it might just work.
With the election of Donald Trump last week, many Australians have grown uneasy about the known hostility between him and the Australian ambassador to America, Kevin Rudd.
While many on the right are crossing their fingers for Kevin Rudd to be humiliatingly sent back to Australia, others within the government have devised a plan to mend the fragile relationship.
They’ll settle this on the handball court.
Handball diplomacy.
“It’s something we think Donald Trump can get behind. Winner gets bragging rights; it’s meritocracy in its truest form,” said a government spokesperson.
It’s reported that Rudd is already on board with the plan.
“Any court, any time, any ball,” Rudd stated.
“No cherries and kings serve, obviously.”
While some have warned that the playground game, a staple in any Australian school, might be a bit foreign to an American, most agree that Trump can’t really deal with backing down from a challenge.
“If he denies the challenge, we always have the foolproof card we won’t hesitate to pull out if we have to,” a government spokesperson explained.
“Calling him a chicken.”
As the Australian diplomatic community waits in suspense to see where and when the game will go down, all eyes remain on Rudd as he practices his slogs and dog shots on a wall in a back lane in Washington, D.C.