MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT
A shocking report has revealed that thousands of millennials now suffer from CTE after being punched in the head dozens of times by their older sibling with those giant foam hulk hands in 2003.
The scathing report revealed that the Hulk hand toys, seemingly a staple in every Australian household with young boys following the 2003 release of The Hulk movie, have had devastating consequences on the neurodevelopment of an entire generation of men.
“It’s far worse than we ever could have predicted” Said a distraught Margaret Phelps (71), a leading researcher of the report.
“A devastating percentage of men that were children from 2003-2007 have suffered irreversible damage”
The report also highlighted that younger siblings, often the punching bags in these scenarios, now display a strange mix of PTSD and an irrational fear of lime green.
Some former Hulk hand owners were interviewed for the study, but most couldn’t recall owning the toys, likely due to repeated foam-based head trauma.
Toy manufacturers have since defended their product, stating, “We had no idea that encouraging children to role-play as an uncontrollably angry superhero would lead to such outcomes.”
