CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
Not even a week after Federal Parliament passed laws banning the use of social media for Australians under the age of 16, and it seems the new legislation is already working!
This comes after a crudely constructed bong was discovered behind the sheds at one of Betoota’s cricket ovals.
For those readers who may have been born after the turn of the millenia, a bong is a filtration device generally used for smoking cannabis, tobacco, or other herbal substances – but mostly cannabis.
Without a medical licence, they are illegal to buy in most Australian states – hence why unruly teenagers have been traditionally quick to learn how to make them by hand from a fairly young age.
With nothing more than a plastic bottle, a makeshift downspout, chewing gum and a local water bubbler – pre-social media teenagers were able to spend countless hours giggling and looking at clouds.
But with the rise of social media, this form of delinquency has been hard to come by, as teenagers retreat indoors to chase synthetic endorphin hits from algorithmic platforms delivered directly into their brain’s reward systems by US and Chinese tech giants.
Local man, Reg Sterling (66) has been the groundsman and treasurer for the Betoota Dolphins Cricket Club for over 40 years. He says it’s been at least a decade since he saw a homemade bong stashed in the bushes behind the change rooms.
“I know for the last couple years there’s been serious concerns within the club about a lack of numbers in the junior grades” says Reg.
“Ya know, with every local kid sitting at home glued to their iPhones”
“But this discovery has instilled a fair bit of hope in the board”
As Reg points out, the bong was crafted using a plastic Orchy bottle and a length of hose stolen that had been cut off from a nearby pensioners front lawn.
“It has all the hallmarks of what we used to call a misspent youth”
“But it 2024, this kind of delinquency is quite inspiring. It means the kids are outside at least. Hopefully sooner or later one of them will pick up a bat and delivers our nation to cricketing glory”
