EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

A local man has come to the crushing realisation that a cute girl was having a crack at him, only a good two weeks after the interaction.

Puffing away on his weed volcano as he recounted the story to his mate, Dan Bourke, 32 soon found himself collapsing into a fit of expletives as he realised how oblivious he’d been to such overt signs of flirtation.

“I can’t stop thinking about this cute girl I saw at Henry’s a few weeks ago”, he’d explained to his friend Blake, referring to a cafe near his house, “I was just staring off into space and it accidentally looked like I was staring at her but she like, gave me this cheeky wink.”

“God she was beautiful.”

“Did you speak to her?”, Blake had queried, to which Dan had simply shaken his head.

“Dude, she was flirting with you, you fucking idiot.”

In real time, Blake was able to see Dan go through all five stages of grief as he processed his fuckup.

“Wait what? Oh…fuck. FUCK.”

“Thanks, this is going to keep me awake at night.”

More to come.

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