ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
After a recent fall, a local sexagenarian has found himself in Betoota Base Hospital with a broken coccyx and fractured humorous.
Murray Sockman was collecting his mail on Friday morning when he came across some ice slathered across his Betoota Heights driveway.
His late-model Hush Puppies, which advertised ‘extra grip’ on the box, were no match for the slick black ice beneath them.
“All of a sudden, I was sliding toward the road,” Murray told our reporters.
“My arms were whooshing and windmilling to keep balance – but it was too late.”
He fell backwards onto his rump and tried to cushion the fall with his right arm, ended up breaking both.
But as his hospital visit is looking more like a hospital stay, family members have been trickling in to see the broken-bummed Gemini in an attempt to cheer him up.
However, as his 17-year-old granddaughter, Lucy Sockman, told The Advocate just a short time ago – it was hard to ignore the huge jug of cold piss hanging off the end of his bed.
“Grandpa needs to drink some water,” she said.
“It really did stink, like my fucking eyes were watering from the ammonia. It was hard to ignore, especially when I know the other end of the pipe going into the jug is up his urethra,”
“But I chose to ignore it. I could’ve made fun of it and put the piss jug on my Insta story but I reckon it’d hurt his feelings. It’s pretty funny, now I think of it,”
“It really was the elephant in the room.”
Our reporter went back to ask Mr Sockman about the jug of piss hanging off the end of the bed and how his visitors might feel about it – but he’d just had his morphine topped up.
“I feel like I’m in a spa,” he said.
More to come.
