EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT

A Betoota Heights man has today been silenced after trying to offer some thoughts on how his home should be decorated, it’s reported.

It’s alleged Tom Pritchard [36] had come home one Saturday afternoon to find that his Ikea coffee table had been replaced with a sleek, walnut one – not that he noticed, but his wife Janine pointed it out.

Explaining that she was aiming for an ‘eclectic look’, Janine had enthusiastically scrolled through the various Pinterest boards she’d created, chatting animatedly about bold colours and textures and splashes of greenery. As she showed Tom some chairs she spotted on Gumtree at an eye-watering price, Janine was hell-bent on realising her vision, whether Tom agreed or not.

“I’m thinking eclectic bohemian but with a 70s twist”, says Janine.

“I found some authentic Don Rex furniture which I think will pair really well with the timber floors.”

“I just think now that we’re in our thirties, we should be investing in quality pieces and creating a home that’s us?”

“A marble floor lamp would go well over there, and I think maybe we put your mum’s painting in the back room. Like don’t get me wrong, I like it, but I don’t think the pink colours will really go with anything?”

“Couch has definitely got to go. I reckon a simple distressed brown leather lounge and a nice abstract rug.”

As Janine paused to survey the rest of the lounge room, Tom piped up that a black feature wall might be nice, only to be immediately shushed.

“Hmmm…I think a burnt orange throw.” 

More to come.

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