LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
High school teacher Vincent ‘Mr M’ Matheson (40) got a pleasant surprise today when he told-off a student in his year 9 history class for eating during ‘his time.’
The student in question, Miriam Crupp, was trying to give a piece of bread lightly smeared with Vegemite to the Canadian exchange student when Mr M intervened.
Originally a by-product of beer manufacturing, Vegemite is a spiced breakfast spread that is found in a patriotic 7 out of 10 Australian pantries and an ill-advised 1 out of ten Australian fridges.
While taking Crupp aside to explain how she would fail in life if she ate in class, Mr M learnt that his rebellious student was simply trying to see how funny it would be to see the exchange student eat Vegemite for the first time.
“Aw yeah, that would be pretty good actually,” stated Mr M, not knowing this would be the coolest any student would ever find him during his whole career.
“But not in class, I will not stand for it.”
“At recess. At the silver seats by the canteen.”
Mr M then took on voluntary recess duty so he could catch a glimpse of the poor Canadian youth choking on a salty black morsel of the nation’s favourite breakfast.
At the time of writing, Canadian exchange student Liam Mount states the taste of Vegemite is so bad he was forced to dip into his emergency supply of Clamato juice to get the taste out of his mouth.
