ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Internet sleuths have identified the mystery woman caught getting pashed by eccentric Australian billionaire Twiggy Forrest as American actor Jared Leto.
The Perthanese mining magnate was spotted strolling in Paris with Leto this week which set the internet ablaze with speculation.
Representatives for Jared Leto refused to confirm or deny a romantic relationship with Mr Forrest but said anyone with a heart and a brain is a sucker for a well-spoken, well-dressed country boy in a nice shirt, a pair of slim cut moleskins and a clean pair of RMs.
Closer to home, locals have told The Advocate that they wish them the best.
“Jesus wept,” said one small business owner in Betoota Heights.
“Does this pass as news these days? Why don’t you write something about the Mayor’s wife always seeming to own land on the edge of town that gets rezoned for development? Or about how you’ve got blokes down at the greyhound putting speed in a McDonald’s straw and blowing it up the arse of their dog?”
“Dogs have been dropping there for years and The Advocate has remained silent? I don’t care about Twiggy Forrest or what he’s up to. Unless he’s planning on buying the last few heritage pubs in Betoota and letting them burn down mysteriously, like Clancy’s [editor of this masthead] family has been doing for generations, I don’t care. I’ve been to Paris and it’s a shithole.”
The Advocate reached out to Twiggy Forrest’s PA for comment but were told we’d have a greater chance seeing James Packer’s gooch in the flesh than we’d have getting comment from them regarding this.
More to come.
