ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
“Fuck,” he said firmly enough for his neighbour across the hall to hear.
A socially-popular Betoota Heights man swore as he apologised to his clothes today after forgetting to hang them out to dry for the fourth time since last Friday.
“For Christ’s sake,” he said to himself.
“These socks are already sticking to the soles of my shoes. What am I going to do?”
Miles Greenie did the only thing a 34-year-old confirmed bachelor could do in that situation – he turned the socks inside out then put them on upside down so the sole of the sock was now running up the tops of his feet.
“This will have to do until tomorrow.”
Speaking to our reporter this afternoon, Greenie explained that he left a note for himself so he wouldn’t forget.
“I’ve also set a reminder on my phone,” he said.
“Which I’ve been told still works even if your service has been cut-off. I’m currently at war with VodaCuck because they sent me an outrageous $450 phone bill after I got back from overseas,”
“But yeah. Can you actually ring me but and remind me, just in case?”
J.R. Holeman & Sons Bookkeepers in the Old City District are currently offering $1.23 odds that Mr Greenie’s clothes will endure a sixth wash cycle tomorrow.
More to come.
