ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A local grazier came to a shocking realisation last night while he was enjoying a cold tin as he cooked dinner on the barbeque for his family.
Mark Collins, a prominent South Betoota grain and sheep farmer, told The Advocate this morning that he could never work in an office, ever.
“I don’t know how people do it,” said the 44-year-old – moments after wooing that last of his freshly-drenched second-cross ewes out of the race.
“Getting up each morning at 7am, only to be in work an hour later. Sitting on the bus, breathing someone else’s breath. Not for me. If I could have my time again, I wouldn’t change anything. I’d stay put right here on the rich, volcanic alluvial plains here in Betoota,”
“I could never work in an office, mate. Not now, not ever. Not even a small one in town. Crazy.”
However, The Advocate can reveal that Mr Collins has never worked in an office – a salient issue when comparing the lifestyles of big city suitcucks and people working on the land.
Speaking candidly to The Advocate about his rewarding existence going to work each day at a bespoke, artisan French Quarter law firm, 25-year-old Peter Tomlinson said he sees merit in both ways of living.
“The thought of getting smoked by some rank cleanskin mickey bull first thing on dusty Monday morning is not my definition of fun,” he said.
“Also, getting so tired and dirty. What if you want to go out after work? There’s no reception out there, either. How does he watch Ricky & Mortman after dinner? Does he watch the ABC and fall asleep after Four Corners? Sorry, but yuck,”
“He [Mr Collins] should at least try working in an office before he puts shit on it. He might like it. I’ve never worked a day on a farm and I’m not getting all preachy about how much it sucks. Each to their own I say.”
More to come.
