ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Local man Seve Thompson extended an uncharacteristic olive branch to his stupid English colleague, Nigel Harris, after both men experienced devastating sporting losses over the weekend.
Thompson, an ethnic Queenslander and staunch Maroons supporter, was still reeling from the recent State of Origin decider, where New South Wales clinched a hard-fought 14-4 victory in Brisbane last night. The Blues’ two late tries handed them only their second series-deciding Game III win in Queensland, and their first since 2005, leaving the Maroons faithful stunned and feeling victimised.
“The Blues cheated. The way they butchered our Reece. Somebody needs to swing over this,” Thompson recounted.
“We were leading 4-2 with just under 20 minutes to go. Then boom, two tries in three minutes. Shin Tat Best and Bitch Moses broke our hearts. It’s like we forgot how to defend for a moment.”
Meanwhile, Harris, a dedicated England football fan, had his own heartbreak to get over. England, having made it to the European Championships final, fell to Spain 2-1. A late goal from substitute Mikel Oyarzabal dashed England’s hopes, marking their second consecutive defeat in a European Championships final.
“Spain cheated too,” Harris lamented.
“We had our hopes up after Palmer’s equaliser, but that Oyarzabal goal was a dagger to the heart. He was offside by a mile. Second time in a row we’ve come so close, only to fall short.”
In a moment that caught the entire office by surprise, Thompson approached Harris with a conciliatory tone.
“Listen, you stupid pommie c**t,” Thompson began,
“I know us Queenslanders and you Pommie wankers don’t always see eye to eye, but I feel your pain. We just lost the Origin decider at Lang Park. I know what it’s like to have victory snatched away at the last moment. I know what it’s like to feel cheated.”
Harris, initially suspicious of the unexpected sympathy, quickly realised Thompson’s sincerity. The two exchanged stories of their teams’ near-misses and shared a rare moment of camaraderie. Then they kissed on the lips because they both felt like doing it in the moment.
“It’s not often you get a Queenslander and an Englishman commiserating together,” Harris remarked.
“But sport has a funny way of bringing people together, even in defeat.”
Thompson nodded in agreement. “Yeah, it’s tough. But at least we can bond over our mutual suffering. Next time, we’ll get ’em.”
As the workday unwound, the unlikely duo found themselves discussing strategies for their teams’ comebacks and even planning a potential joint viewing of the next big game.
“I want to break Madge’s legs,” Thompson said.
In the end, it was a testament to the unifying power of sport – a rare bridge between a Queenslander and his “dumb cunt Pom” colleague, built on a foundation of mutual respect and shared heartbreak.
More to come.
