WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
As the sun sets on one of the most decorated political careers in our nation’s history, The Betoota Advocate would like to pay tribute.
Earlier today, former Prime Minister Scott Morrison announced that he would be quitting politics.
While he’s yet to confirm exactly what it is he will be moving on to, speculation is that he will take up lucrative positions with defence companies – a position that has absolutely nothing to do with the Australian government spending hundreds of billions on submarines while he was the Prime Minister.
So, with The Advocate lowering its flag to half mast in honour of one of its favourite politicians, here are some of the memorable moments from a career plagued by loudmouth blue haired lefties giving an honest Aussie bloke a hard time.
8. Not Too Far From Here: Geez, what a beat up this was. Prime Minister Scott Morrison came out to remind the nation that 4,000 people heading out for the March 4 Justice were lucky because they weren’t being shot by the army or police. As he said; “This is a vibrant liberal democracy. Not far from here, such marches, even now, are being met with bullets – but not here in this country. This is a triumph of democracy when we see these things take place.” If you’ve got such an issue with this, well, we’ve got a list of places you can pack up and move to.
7. Having A Strum Of The Ukulele: Fuck me, shoot a bloke for having a hobby. If you missed it, the horde of rabid lefties wanted to tear Scotty limb from limb for playing a ukulele, in his own home. We mention later in the list why this was such a big deal apparently – but because of those who tried to tear him down, it was a pretty embarrassing chapter in our nation’s history.
6. Not Ordering Enough Jabs During A Global Crisis: So apparently it was one man’s job to make sure that the government funding of scientific products designed to protect the nation, results in the nation actually receiving the products because the bloke in charge made the effort to call the company in charge of the products… I’ll let you be the judge of that.
5. Claiming Local Muslim Leaders Should Be Responsible For The Behaviour Of Their Community Despite Actively Being Part Of A Church With A History Of Child Abuse: Cronulla has a proud history. Let’s not forget that.
4. Bringing Coal Into Parliament: How do you think you charged the phone you are reading this on you idiot? It was cloudy this morning so it definitely wasn’t solar because you aren’t rich enough to own a decent storage battery thanks to tireless and thankless work of good honest fossil fuel lobbyists. Yeah, so before you go trying to crucify a bloke for bringing some coal into parliament, just remember your personal behaviour – that definitely isn’t dictated by large companies who control how we live and what we consume.
3. Secretly Undermining Democracy To Give Himself More Power: Why limit a man so competently performing his role to just one? He nailed the Prime Ministership, why not let him run all the big departments? You would have thought he’d shit on your mum’s prized rug the way the echo-chamber journos carried on about Scotty’s decision to secretly desecrate the way our democracy works. Give me a break.
2. Orchestrating An Illegal And Vicious Debt Recovery Scheme That Demonised Some Of The Most Vulnerable Members Of Society: Turn it up. Holding a bunch dole bludgers accountable by telling them to prove they actually deserve the money they are being given by the government… Cry me a river. If they want to be given handouts well they need to become big companies like Qantas and scratch the back of our nation’s politicians with a membership that provides some free shitty tuna bake a cold 150 Lashes.
1. Secretly Flying To Hawaii During A National Crisis, Lying To The Public And Refusing To Come Home Until It Became Clear His Job Was On Line: You’ve never been on a holiday have you? The bloke doesn’t hold a hose, and when he came back for some photos, all you lot did was hammer him for trying to get a good shot. This is was the darkest hour, when an honest hardworking Australian was raked over the coals for taking a well deserved holiday.
