KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
An all-boys University sharehouse has descended into a new stage of depravity, after sinking to a new depth.
Located in Betoota’s French quarter, the two-storey terrace was the scene of severe hygiene crime, as four male engineering students began using multi-purpose spray to wash their dishes.
Speaking to The Advocate, first year fresher Nathan Sard (22) said the use of Lemon Lime Pine O Cleen to wash three day old dishes was simply an act of economic sustainability
“When you’re living on Mi-Goreng and Weet-Bix every week, do you think we’ve got space in our weekly budget to buy dishwashing liquid?”
“Every dollar we save can go towards a box of Cardboardeux for the weekend, so we have to try and cut a few corners where we can.”
Surprisingly, the future chemical biotechnician was unphased about the prospect of using a product made with Citric Acid and Benzalkonium Chloride on the same items he uses to frequently eat off.
“Well it’s all the same stuff isn’t it?”
“If they use it to wipe down tables in cafes, why wouldn’t you get a bit of extra value out of the bottle and give your dishes a spray?”
“It’s called Multi-Purpose for a reason aye!”
With O-Week decorations still hanging in the kitchen and a milk crate being used as a recycling bin, early signs suggest the boys are resigned to never getting their $1500 bond back.
After managing the first six weeks of their 1st semester at South Betoota Polytechnic without a single washed sheet, the boys admitted their social life was taking precedence over any form of house chores.
“We did have a bottle of dish soap once, but I think we used it all up in O-Week when we set up the slip n’ slide on campus.”
“We probably used a bit too much to be honest, one of our mates broke his arm on that thing.”
“It was pretty funny though ha ha!”.
More depravity to come.
