CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
A local man has today been reminded that it is a lovely Saturday afternoon, and he hasn’t explicitly expressed his commitment to be anywhere in particular.
Flight Path District car salesman, Jackie Fontaine (26) had initially planned on a quiet evening watching any number of the new TV shows he is currently paying out the arse for on 6 different streaming platforms.
However, his close mates have managed to wear him down through reasonable debate, and very hurtful slander.
One Jackie’s highly-active group chats, named ‘PIGS’, has been chipping at him all day.
“What have you got this evening?” asks the biggest chirper in the group chat, Poopie (28).
“Fuck all. So, come over for a beer with the boys” he followed up, before the message could even be responded to – accompanied by a picture of a Fosters tin cracking.
Another friend, Bernie (27), takes a more gentle approach.
“Think about this for a minute, Jackie” writes Bernie.
“3 years ago we couldn’t leave the house. And in a few more months it will be Winter. It’s probably worth taking advantage of that.”
The group chat makes a few valid points. Jackie doesn’t have anything on this evening and it is a wonderfully sunny afternoon.
“Okay. I’ll come over,” concedes Jackie.
“Fuck here we go. How bout the rubber arm on this clown ha ha ha” writes Poopie.
“See ya soon, cowboy.”
