ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A crisp G♯5 tone could be heard across Rivendell Street in Betoota Heights this morning prompting some locals to ask the Facebook community page if anyone else was hearing the strange noise.
What they heard wasn’t artificial, it was beaming from the throat of Miles Doherty. The 29-year-old had just blasted his pinkie toe on his coffee table and was giving Barry Gibb a run for his money in the falsetto game.
Barry Gibb, of the Bee Gees, managed to reach the mysterious G#5 note in only a handful of tracks.
One being the world-renown Stayin’ Alive from their 1977 magnum opus Saturday Night Fever. However, a year before that young Barry was able to blow the doors off Love So Right off the Children of the World album that farewelled the group’s mid-70s foray into R&B. Listeners had to wait until 1991 for another chance to hear Barry throw all self-doubt to the wayside and really go for it. True Confessions from the album High Civilization not only features the last time Barry hit that magical G#5 note, it’s also exactly what cocaine washout syndrome sounds like.
Closer to home, Miles said he was running late for work this morning and on the other side of the darkened living room, he spied where he kicked his work boots off the night before.
So he was moving at speed when his pinky toe met the leg of his oregon coffee table.
He gently rocked his head back and using his diaphragm, he held that G#5 for seven full seconds until his own voice returned.
“You softwood cunt!” he spat.
“Fuck me dead, it’s fucking broken!”
More to come.
