WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
In some good news for cashed-up investors who enjoy turning the universal human right of housing into a money-making pyramid scheme, a quaint little coastal dream has just been listed on the market!
Just 1 kilometre (1.9k’s to be exact) from the nearest beach in the rapidly gentrifying coastal town, the 3 bedroom Hampton’s inspired bungalow comes in at just under 900,000.
The slice of heaven will sell for much over a million of course, but the local council employee turned real estate agent reckons it’s an absolute steal at anything under 1.3 million.
Boasting a recently Bunnings renovated kitchen, the house in one of the last predominantly working-class parts of town is having an open house this weekend, with interested buyers urged to look past the meth lab under the neighbour’s house and the rusted out old falcon that’s been picked apart for spare parts like a leftover roast chook on a building site.
“It is an investors dream. A slice of the Australian dream” said local agent Clayton McMillian to The Advocate.
“I mean, it’s a coastal property that will inevitably go up at least 20% in the next year,” he explained.
“And the town’s still got enough blue-collar peasants to pay your mortgage for you!”
“Great little private school in town if you ever decided to move your little darlings up here, and those pesky neighbours will be pushed outta here in no time,” he explained.
“The takeaway store’s all have actual barista’s now, so things are trending up big time!”
“Don’t worry, I’ve told the local council employee who owns the place with his wife to get rid of the little plantation out the back before the inspection, so it should be all ship shape.”
“Hamptons inspired too,” finished the local door opener, referencing the renos the owner did a couple of decades ago.
“Don’t miss out!”
