Report Finds 70% Of Blokes Who Pass Out At House Parties Are Uninvited Strangers

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A recent survey by the CSIRO has found that 70% of the people who drink until they are not conscious at Australian house parties, are the type of people who came with another group and no one really knows who they are.

Proffesor Lote Meninga, from the Queensland laboratory says it’s an obscure phenomenon, but one that reoccurs right around the world.

“More often than not, if you are the type of bloke who passes out in plain sight of everyone because you’ve drunk too much and eaten to little, it’s because not many people know you at the party and therefore don’t know what to do with you”

Local passed out guy (maybe named Ben?) says he was exactly that on the weekend.

“I didn’t really know too many people at the house party so I just kept drinking because it was the easiest thing to do. I just needed to look preoccupied”

“All of a sudden someone handed me a joint, I think, and the rest is history”

“I dunno, maybe I just drank too much”

“Either way I’m glad I don’t know any of them and never have to see any of them again”