CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
With the government under siege, Prime Minister Scotty From Marketing has today had to act swiftly to remind both the media and voters that he is a run-of-the-mill Aussie dad.
This comes after a devastating week for the Coalition, one that has seen their ‘alleged rapist problem’ turn into an ‘alleged serial rapist problem’ – which has since become a ‘multiple alleged rapists problem’.
The incredibly poorly handled cluster of sexual assault claims levelled against some of the highest-ranking Liberal Party powerbrokers has seen the shine come off the Prime Minister’s family man branding.
Throw in the Aged Care Royal Commission findings, as well as police reports multiple right-wing extremist attacks on innocent civillians across the nation – and things aren’t looking good for the marketing guru.
In response to this battering, Morrison has taken to social media today to post photos of himself being a classic daggy dad.
Off the back of the success of his previous backyard chicken coup photo shoot, the PM has today taken it one further by installing an intensive poultry farming operation in his backyard.
The Morrison’s new battery chicken hangar is capable of housing up to 100,000 point-of-lay hens – and is a testament to how capable the Prime Minister is on the tools.
However, agricultural experts are beginning to question whether or not Morrison has the handy-man skills and business nous to pull off an operation of this size.
“Hmmmm” says Betoota’s local member, David Littleproud MP.
“Ive got some poultry farmers in the Maranoa… I don’t want to cause any divisions in the party… But I’m not sure Scotty is up to building a 100,000-hen chook pen on his quarter acre block in Cronulla”
“Not without a bit of help from the Ingham or Steggles families”
Former Deputy PM Barnaby Joyce is also skeptical.
“Look, I understand that this is the image he is trying portray… As a half baked jack of all trades” said Joyce.
“But this bloke didn’t build that shed. Not with just a couple hammers and a professional photographer on hand”
Mr Joyce then broke in to a purple hue as he laughed hysterically at the prospect of the Liberal Party leader knowing which way to hold a hammer.
“I spose that was probably the case with the three by three metre timber coup he built back in May. There’s no way he built that either”
“[smokers laugh]”
