Penrith Panthers Heart Throb Liam Martin ROBBED Of World’s Sexiest Man Title By That Dork From The Office
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The nation is currently reeling this morning, after some shocking news from the entertainment world.
Slowly filtering in from the United States, it's been confirmed that the Temora Terrier has been overlooked for a big nod.
After claiming the Clive Churchill Medal in this year's NRL Grand Final, many had expected Liam Martin to be a sure thing...
“The Gender Pay Gap’s A Myth” Says Bloke Who Earns 190k Driving Big Tonka Truck Which Goes Vroom
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
Economists and social theorists are today eating humble pie after being destroyed by a Gold Coast man named Bevan Thomas.
After a big week of nurses and midwives campaigning to try and get paid somewhat accordingly for what they do, big Bevan has told them to suck it up.
"Mate no one's forcing em to work as nurses," said...
“Oh How Did That Get In There,” Laughs Boyfriend Pulling 6-Pack Out Of Grocery Bag
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local boyfriend has pulled it off, it can be confirmed.
Local Betoota Heights man Eli Apple managed to get it done yesterday evening, sorting out dinner and a beer without leaving the house.
The long term boyfriend who is actually a fiancè but hasn’t quite cemented the terminology in his brain yet, kindly told his future wife to take...
NSW Government Tells Nurses To Recruit A Few More Blokes If They Want That Pay Rise
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The Newcastle Sydney and Wollongong (NSW) Government has today issued an ultimatum to the state's nurses and midwives.
With the sectors striking over their pay and conditions, NSW Health Minister Ryan Park has revealed there's a simple fix if they wanna get paid.
"Hire a few more blokes," said Minister Park.
"If you wanna get paid like...
Gladiator 2 Praised For Having Something For Both Mums And Daughters
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The minds and money men behind the blockbuster of the year, have been praised by members of our local community today.
In a weird turn of events, local mother and daughter duo Michelle and Jocelyn Rowntree have come out to commend the casting of Gladiator 2.
The long awaited sequel is set to hit cinemas this week, with...
Local Kiwi Has The Nerve To Say Migration Is Seriously Affecting Our Housing Market And Economy
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A man from the land of the Long White Cloud has ruffled a few feathers in his office today, after making some interesting claims about the state of the world.
The Kings College and University of Otago graduate did so a short time ago, when claiming that Australia's migration policy is causing serious grief.
"Mate Ozzie really needs...
Kelpies Dance Routine Generates Anger Amongst Men Who Need 14 Schooners To Have That Much Fun
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
in some breaking news from our pebblecrete suburb of Betoota Heights, a local old boy has been told to take the day off.
This comes after Rodney Phillips (64) decided to voice his opinions about the Australian Men's Netball team in a couple of family group chats.
Unsurprisingly, the man who's brain has been rotted by various algorithms...
Friday Beer = Yummy!
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
In some breaking news from the schooner shop - Friday afternoon beer = yummy!
The hard hitting news comes courtesy of a couple of local drinkers at the Betoota Ponds Bowling Club.
Staring out into the nature reserve on the edge of the ponds, the two local fellas have confirmed that a couple of cold schooners are going...
Mate Becomes A Thermal Engineer When It Comes Time To Loading Up The Esky
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
The newest plus-one inclusion to a tight-knit circle of girlfriends in Betoota Grove has today stepped up to the plate to show his worth in front of the lesser blokes.
Until minutes ago, Adrian Rocksolid (25) was just the new dork that Kelly had been seeing. That was until someone arrived with a bag of party ice.
Adrian, who still...
Man Fully On Board With Having Chip Put In His Brain If It Means He Doesn’t Have To Remember All Of His Passwords
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local Betoota Ponds man has today revealed to The Advocate his stance on a topical philosophical issue.
Max Hope (29) has confirmed that he'd actually let that weirdo Elon Musk put a micro-chip in his brain - under one condition.
"Mate, if his chip means I never have to remember a password again, then that sicko can go...
