West Coast Eagles Fan Disgusted To Learn What A Top-Knot Is
4 October, 2015. 10:50
IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact
The AFL's Grand Final is here and what a divide we have. The heavily-tattooed West Coast Eagles fans attempting to out-cheer the culturally elite Hawthorn Hawks fans.
After driving across the Nullabor to Melbourne in one 42-hour-stint, Perth construction development officer, Adam Bond says he wishes he had spent more time staring into the sun...
Victorian Man Plans To Boo At Television During NRL Grand Final
4 October, 2015. 10:50
IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact
In a jam-packed Grand Final weekend, the people from every state and sovereignty across this nation have vested interests in some sort of football match.
Whether its the South and West of the country tuning in to watch the Saturday night's AFL Grand Final between the Hawthorn Hawks and West Coast Eagles - Or whether...
The NRL Celebrates All-Queensland Grand Final With New Trophy
29 September, 2015. 10:50
IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact
The National Rugby League has today unveiled the "new and improved" Provan-Summons Trophy, to be awarded to one of the two Queensland-based teams in Sunday night's grand final showdown.
With the Brisbane Bronco's comfortable defeat over the Sydney Roosters on Friday night, The North Queensland Cowboys then confirmed an all-Queensland NRL decider after defeating Melbourne...
Melbourne’s Public Transport System Rated One Of The Best In Victoria
28 September, 2015. 11:00
EGBERT ADRIANSON| Melbourne| Contact
Visitors arriving in Melbourne are amazed by how efficient the public transport system is, with the Victorian capital being praised by the Economist Intelligence Unit for having "The best public transport system in Victoria, and other parts of the world".
"The trains in Japan are way too fast," said one businessman from Tokyo, a city...
Scat boy regrets everything that’s ever happened
27 September, 2015. 09:35
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
AFTER DUMPING HIS third cap of the evening, Miles Panache says he wasn't sure if that was the right decision. While onlookers looked on, Miles and his co-drug-affected friends formed a huddle in the makeshift dancefloor of their mutual friends living room. As their skulls met side by side in the...
Local Man Googles “Rugby Union News” After Reading Entire Daily Telegraph
24 September, 2015. 12:50
IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact
Thomas Hadden, 27, says he is shocked and appalled that he has been forced to google the keywords "Rugby, Union, News" after reading the most circulated newspaper in Australia.
Despite the fact that the Wallabies have just played their first match of the olympiad international Rugby Union World Cup, Mr Hadden was forced to...
Prime Minister Turnbull is flawless, says Eastern Suburbs artist
22 September, 2015. 16:10
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
The newly sworn-in Prime Minister of Australia, Malcolm Turnbull, has today appeared as the subject of a "guerrilla art" instalment that hangs from the roof of a historic hotel in his hometown electorate.
In the style of Obama's iconic image of "hope" made famous during the 2008 Obama campaign, Mr Turnbull stands as tall...
Nick Cave Begs Senator Brandis To Slash Funding To The Betoota Advocate
18 September, 2015. 16:10
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
Not even an entire day after Australian musical icon Nick Cave wrote andopen letter to Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull asking him to sack Senator George Brandis as Minister for the Arts, and restore independent funding and oversight to the literary sector, The Betoota Advocate has been informed that our humble online newspaper is next on the chopping...
Grown Man Who Enjoys Rollerblading Gets Way More Action Than You
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
Jerry Antoniou is a self-described "adrenaline junkie" who spends his afternoons taking part in high-speed rollerblading at local boardwalks.
Jerry is 42-years-old and has been to three different Nickelback concerts in three different international cities. He owns thirteen different types of fedora hats and three variations of Crocs.
"I don't know what it is, I've just...
Bieber Surprises Aussie Fans, Arrives A Week Early For Bulldogs Fan Day
16 September, 2015. 15:45
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
Beliebers, rejoice - global superstar Justin Bieber has returned to Australia for a secret finals fan day at Belmore Oval.
The Canadian singer, who is set to take over the iconic Sydney waterfront for a live concert on Wednesday next week, has arrived a week early to show support for his favourite National Rugby League...