Politics

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT For Ross Wylett (68), maintaining progressive political views is much harder than it is for most bleeding heart lefties. For one, he’s made a lot of money out of the workers. And two, he’s a rich old white man who lives in a suburb that puts fairy lights in the trees for no reason. After a fruitful career as a manufacturer...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact After absolutely copping it in the media for getting a couple of figures wrong, opposition leader Anthony Albanese has been urged to find god in an effort to get back in Murdoch’s good graces, seeing as that doesn’t appear to be a topic any of the Newscorp journalists want to touch with a ten-foot barge pole. This advice comes...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Holding on to the power to call an election like a weeping toddler being told to put the plastic lightsaber back on the Big W shelf, many Australians are wondering what Scotty’s defining achievement will be from his alleged time as Prime Minister. Although there is no assurance that Scotty will lose his job when it comes time to...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT One of the nation's most high-profile feminist allies has won praise tonight, after helping a girlfriend out of an uncomfortable situation. Prime Minister and girl boss advocate Scott Morrison has reportedly just put his most passive-aggressive dance moves on, to let a guy on the dance floor know that his friend is interested. Occurring a short time ago,...

GALADRIEL GRIMACE | Far West | Contact This evening, the Prime Minister has shared a string of anecdotes that prove he is a feminist ally after his political opponents brought that part of his past into question. In his most recent, Scott Morrison explained that when he was just a pencil pusher at Tourism Australia, he bore witness to something he...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The new and improved feminist ally Scott Morrison has blown away voters with his newfound respect for women. This follows last night's news that he had intervened in his party's NSW pre-selection processes to protect "great women" within his ranks. The revelation was made on the ABC's 7:30 program, where Morrison said he controversially stepped in because he is...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the National Party continues to distance themselves from Scott Morrison ahead of the 2022 Federal Election, bizarre things are beginning to unfold in Canberra. With the Prime Minister told to stay the fuck away from local campaigns by some of his most loyal colleagues, it was the Opposition leader joining the Agriculture Minister at one of the most...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Morrison Government have finally hinted that the 2022 Federal Election will be held in mid-May. This comes after months of tumultuous pre-selection dramas throughout NSW, as the different Liberal Party branches across the state work tirelessly to pull together a team of candidates that looks the exact opposite to the Prime Minister and his friends. Ongoing factional warfare has...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact The story that the ALP wishes would just fuck off appears to have grown horns today as a leaked document, allegedly penned by the Labor trio dubbed the ‘mean girls’, was leaked to the media. The leaked document titled the Burn Book, features multiple scathing indictments of several notable Labor party members. It was brought to the attention of...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Australian Labor Party has today announced one of the strangest political marriages in history. The Opposition has revealed that they plan to run the second richest man in Australia in the outer Melbourne electorate of Calwell. Home to suburbs like Broadmeadow and Craigieburn, the move has raised plenty of eyebrows, with concerns about how a mining magnate...