Politics

PM Says State Premiers That He Left To Solve Pandemic Should Stop Interfering In People’s Lives

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The first Prime Minister who was able to make Australians value the existence of the once pointless concept of state governments, has today criticised premiers for their efforts to clean up after him. Australia has 6 state parliaments. It also has 2 territory parliaments known as legislative assemblies. These parliaments are located in Australia's 8 capital cities. Once upon a time, state and territory...

Albo Wins Over Inner-City Liberal Voters By Walking Through Mosman In A Gorgeous Lace Cravat

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the Coalition Government stares down another collapse in leadership, the Federal Opposition has today made a bold play at winning over the swinging inner-city moderate Liberal voters. With both the Liberal Party and the National Party at each others throats about this Net Zero thing they apparently agreed upon so that Scotty could look like a future-focused world...

Government Who Blatantly Refused Inquiry Into Christian Porter Says ABC Is Not Above Scrutiny

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Federal Government has today shocked the nation by appearing to display a bit of hypocrisy on a political issue. After spending the last 12 months fighting tooth and nail to prevent anyone from investigating the behaviour of the man who was the highest-ranking law officer in the land, the Government has today revealed that the ABC can't hide...

Scotty Claims To Have Stayed Up All Night Watching The Cricket

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation's Head of Marketing has fronted the cameras this morning, to continue his naughty habit of telling fibs. After rounding out last week claiming to have never told a lie in public office, Scott Morrison has appeared this morning telling The Advocate that he's fairly under the weather this morning. "Yeah, stayed up all night watching the...

Former Prime Ministers Urged To Shut Up Unless Providing Character References For Cardinal Pell

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT According to the conservative commentators at Sky News and The Australia, former prime ministers Kevin Rudd and Malcolm Turnbull should take cues from their predecessors and “shut up”. That's according to Sky News host Paul Murray, who has been ordered by Rupert Murdoch to squash any criticism of Scotty From Marketing - after the current Prime Minister returns from...

Albo Asked To Explain Why The Fuck He’s Wearing Chinos After Running Into Old Mate From The Flats

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Federal Opposition Leader Anthony Albanese has today received a very important reminder to not forget where he comes from. While campaigning on the streets of his own Grayndler electorate, the Labor leader found himself face-to-face with one of his most important constituents. Dimitri Miliotis, a 63-year-old fitter and turner now based in Lewisham. Or as Albo remembers him, 'one of...

Inner-City Voter On $250K Salary With No Mortgage Worries Albo Isn’t Connecting To The People

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the screws tighten around a possible Federal Election in the next four months, the comrades of the light-rail are beginning to grow concerned that their party won't be able to get it over the line. While Scotty From Marketing's incompetencies as a world leader have somehow managed penetrate through Murdoch's forcefield of the most biased media monopoly in...

“I Reject That!” Scotty Tells Local GP After Being Informed He Could Eat A Few More Vegetables

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Scotty From Marketing has today once again proven that he is very capable of living in a fantasy land where he never has to consider or accept the repercussions of his actions. Speaking to his local GP today during a general check up today, Scotty was informed that his diet of marinara pizzas and Vanilla Coke is in no...

Morrison Tries To Steal A Few Handshakes Off International Leaders Like They’re Bushfire Victims

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact The nation's Prime Minister has done what he does best on the world stage this week. Scotty from Marketing has gone out all guns blazing at the G20 summit today, to try and get the best shots for his team of photographers. Appearing at the conference for world leaders in Italy's capital Rome, Scotty reportedly wasted no time...

ICAC Finds Daryl Maguire Probably Not Gonna Have Too Much Luck On The Dating Scene After This

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Today's ICAC inquiries have revealed that disgraced former Wagga MP Daryl Maguire is not gonna have too much luck on the NSW Riverina dating scene moving forward. This comes after the public was treated to a fairly grim insight into how he treats the women he is allegedly 'personally involved with' - as investigators continue to unveil The watchdog has...

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