Headlines

30 March, 2016. 15:10 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local vegan Jamie Hemmant feels like he isn't doing a good enough job of explaining his boring lifestyle choice - so he's going to send you some links, it has been confirmed. Not even thirty minutes into your first catch up in eighteen months, Jamie has found a way to turn a...

31 March, 2016. 10:15 BRUCE BACHETTO | Traffic | CONTACT Australia's exotic day spa industry is expected to see a boom in business heading into the new financial year, with the government's announcement that "special massages" will now be tax deductible. The federal treasurer, Scott Morrison, announced the changes last week, stating that 'Special Massage' will be included in a tax deductible health services...

31 March, 2016. 16:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact OPPOSITION LEADER BILL SHORTEN revealed he had to shimmy through raw sewerage to attend a press conference this morning in Canberra. Speaking from a courtyard within Parliament House, the 48-year-old former trade unionist said the reason why he hasn't announced alternative policy or even said anything publically this year is because he needed time...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After realising that Australian politics was missing his wildly unhelpful input, Home Affairs Minister Peter Dutton has returned to breakfast television with another hot take about the opinion of an uppity female professional. Dutton has joined a chorus of relevance-deficient conservatives condemning Victoria's Deputy Chief Health Officer Annaliese van Diemen for her comparisons of Captain Cook's arrival on Australian shores...

27 March, 2016. 10:10 CHIP DOUGLAS | Other News | CONTACT The Australian Olympic Committee have today released their athletes uniform for the 2016 Rio Olympics, modelled by their private school graduated athletes. The Alex Perry designed uniforms, which have received mix reviews across social media, were custom-made to align with the privileged image of the current stock of athletes and their elite schooling....

28 March, 2016. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A CASE OF NIGHT TERRORS has left doctors scratching their heads after a local man still wakes up screaming at all hours of the night after six months of unsuccessful treatments. It's a case that's got the attention of medical professionals around the country. Community man Anthony Abbott has suffered from night terrors...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Despite all the adversity faced by local man, Xavier Reilly, he has decided to go against his parents wishes and dedicate his life to creating mildly topical 1000 pixel x 1000 pixel JPEG images, to be shared around the internet for one week at a time. Xavier (29) says his parents have for a long...

24 March, 2016. 16:15 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A traumatised and stateless Australian-based Syrian refugee has today assured her host, Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull, that she is not too keen on joining or even sympathising with the terrorist organisation that took everything she has ever known away from her. "I heard Mr Turnbull's comments that suggested people should be wary...

24 March, 2016. 11:35 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Following world No.1 Novak Djokovic's controversial comments that suggested female players should be thankful to their male counterparts "because they ride on the coattails of the men" - tennis organisers have announced a compromise that will further scale down the female competition during major tournaments. The move has been praised by tennis enthusiasts around the...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local mayor, Councillor Keith Carton has today announced a brief setback in the installation of new Transport Office downtown. Speaking to media today out front of the Diamantina Pastoral Hotel, the Lord Mayor said his office were torn on which specific near-derelict shopping plaza will win the bid to host the RTA. "We are looking for...