Headlines

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Melbourne woman, Shona Birkenstock (22) will be eating Cornflakes and Mi Goreng noodles for the next week, after purchasing 4 x pints of Melbourne Bitter for $14.90 each, at a Courtney Barnett gig over the weekend. "I don't even care. It was so worth it," says the young woman who is currently in her third year of a diploma...

16 February, 2016. 15:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact IN A MOVE TO BOTH unclutter our roads and give Australians a second chance at life, any cyclist caught without a helmet in NSW will be forced to enrol as an organ donor, says the health department. Motorcyclists and cyclists donate more organs than the rest of the population put together, but...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local kid Archie Sinclair is currently fantasising about different ways to burn his entire primary school down with everyone still inside it. These dark thoughts have been triggered by the classroom's extremely embarrassing response to him accidentally referring to his third-grade teacher, Ms Patterson, as 'mum'. What Archie (8) initially thought was a near-inaudible freudian slip, quickly turned into a...

15 January, 2016 10:15 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In an interview with Radio National this morning, the leader of the Palmer United Party, Clive Palmer has revealed just how he is able to continue his day-to-day business and political endeavours while wearing a suit in the blazing Canberra heat. "It has been something I have had a lot of trial and error with,"...

  CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local man, Fraser Cassidy, is just about to begin the second meeting of his busy day today. Later tonight, he has to endure a dinner date with his new kind-of girlfriend, Georgia. Despite booking a last-minute dinner reservation at a high-end restaurant, Mr Cassidy is still in the depths of one of the worst hangovers he has had this year. "I'm ordering...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact ONCE DESCRIBED AS THE great Australian fragrance, Lynx Africa is now being the sole cause of teenage pregnancy across the country. The independent study commissioned by the department of health suggests that the unique scent is responsible for nearly all under 20 hook ups. Alarmingly, when combined with Marlboro Golds, Africa becomes even more potent. However, proponents of...

12 February, 2016 13:45 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT While the National Party prepares for the reshuffle that will follow the retirement of current leader, Warren Truss - it seems the most likely successor, Barnaby Joyce is already settling into his new role as Deputy Prime Minister Of Australia. The Minister for New England was today shown around his new living quarters in the Prime Minister's harbour...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Local man, Shaun Jackson, says he is "pretty cut" after learning that his hot coworker Kelly is actually a full blown happy clapper. Not only that, but she also reads Pedestrian.tv The 29-year-old sales representative spoke to The Advocate today about how he came to learn that his chirpy account manager upheld a relationship with the youth-oriented...

11 January, 2016 11:15 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT New South Wales Premier Mike Baird received a 29-minute standing ovation after delivering an emotional speech to the Women's Temperance League NSW Chapter at a community hall in Kings Cross last night. In what many describe as his "Redfern Speech" moment, Baird was praised by the anti-alcohol movement for "sticking to his guns" regarding...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Although she refuses to admit it, local mum Annette Sawyer has needed help updating her Facebook profile for over three months now. In a moment of hysterical emotion in June 2015, Ms Sawyer joined the masses on social media and decided to show her support for marriage equality by altering her Facebook profile image to include a Gay...