Local News

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT 21-year-old Alanna Wasson says if she'd known it would be this easy, she would have done it ages ago. The daughter and granddaughter of the Wasson family explained to The Advocate today, that she's just relieved she finally drew her mum into the Generation Wars, with a flagrant comment about Seinfeld this afternoon. "I know that aspiring edgelords and inner-city...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local Betoota Ponds-based Muslim, Graham Warne (29) says he couldn't have imagined a more expensive Holy Month. As a hibernating restaurant waiter, not only is he living off JobKeeper, but it's made worse by the fact that he doesn't have the same access to his mum's cooking as he usually would during Ramadan. He also lacks any form...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local stonemason, Billy Wright (29) does not appear to have the slightest understanding of what is currently happening in the Australian medical fraternity. Arriving today as a subcontractor on the new student accommodation project currently being built on the Betoota WQU campus, Billy has been seen chewing his fingernails and coughing openly like some sort of pre-2020 neanderthal. His...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A construction site in Betoota City Limits has today been rattled by the high-pitched che-hoos coming from above, as the Kiwi scaffolders return from the weekend with a new bunch of TikTok dances that their daughters have taught them. The new shopping centre development on Bedourie Bypass Road is just one of thousands of worksites around the country...

TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact Sitting in her recently renovated two-bedroom cell, Tiffany Watson looked around and wondered what the hell she was going to do for lockdown entertainment for another few months. After finishing Instagram for the third time today, Tiffany began having some concerning thoughts. “I wanted to have a baby” “What is wrong with me?” “I’ve never wanted a baby, and now, because I’m...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Many states and territories have allowed home visits of up to two individuals to ease the mental health impact incurred by two months of COVID-19 stress.  While the news has put a smile on the face of every overzealous wine-mum ahead of Mother’s Day, for a generation of MySpace users it has triggered PTSD style flashbacks of having to...

TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact “Tessssaaaa! Can I invite a few of the boys over for beers? Pleeeeaaaasssse” whined fully grown 30-year-old Luke Turner. “Uh, yeah I spose? I don’t know why you’re asking me, it’s your house too.” This was all the permission an excited little Lukey needed to quickly whip together a message inviting up to 10 of his friends over for an...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Brisbane | CONTACT Improvise. Adapt. Overcome. The wise words, first uttered by the marine corps and made famous by Bear Grylls, has now become the war cry of those deeply affected by Coronavirus, as businesses and institutions scramble to find ways to navigate what may be months of strange purgatory in the darkest timeline. One such company, Betoota French...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT The Wilson household doesn’t always see eye to eye on everything but there is one thing they can all agree on - that their pet dog Molly is awfully cute. The Maltese cross Shih Tzu, or ‘the rat’, as affectionately nicknamed by dad, had become quite the talking point during the lockdown, resulting in members of the household...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Not only are Baby Boomers at a higher risk of contracting COVID-19, it has been revealed that many are struggling to find a purpose as they are cut off from pokies, cruises & outbursts of racism on public transport. While social distancing has been a good excuse for some boomers to cross the road to avoid an ethnic looking...