Local News

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A prominent Filipino-Australian family from Betoota's Flight Path District have today shared some of their domestic shortcuts. This week we spoke to Filo icon Jo Koy. Listen here: Namely, keeping the TV remote fresher for longer, and in turn extending it's shelf life. The plastic-coating of everyday household items is a common occurrence within the Filipino diaspora, with reports...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT La Beretta in Betoota's Flight Path District has been a staple of family outings and noisy corporate lunches for several decades. On top of their already homely atmosphere that includes light Italian jazz music and red and white plastic table clothes on the veranda, La Beretta has also adhered to the stereotype of having a framed poster of famous Italian-American...

IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact Once touted as the next table tennis, a local boutique, bespoke, creative, fun, multinational mezzanine-level advertising and public relations firm has revealed that they're the proud owners of a foosball table - but nobody working there quite knows where or how they got it. Speaking exclusively to The Advocate, one of Colenso South Betoota's...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Coalition leadership team has found a solution to the impending tsunami of mortgage stresses and foreclosures on the horizon by explaining that those people need to either get a better job or one that pays way more. Federal Treasurer Josh Frydenberg and Prime Minister Scott Morrison fronted the media today after concerns were raised...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Sarah Goodhue was left internally seething this morning by a comment made during a run of the mill conversation with a colleague. The mid-level brand manager at a PR firm in Betoota’s trendy French Quarter was attempting to show off her left field interests when casually explaining her weekend movements to a colleague named Sam. “Yeah just went to a...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A resident at a local Betoota aged care facility has opened up today about her bold plan to get a half decent meal. Beryl Withers (89) who was residing in the ironically named Betoota Ponds Happy Village, spoke to our reporters about her incredible plan. Transferred to the Betoota Correctional Facility yesterday evening with Grievous Bodily Harm charges levelled against...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The living conditions and personal hygiene of a remarkably unpopular Betoota Heights sharehouse dweller has left his housemate's reeling after it's far lower than what they expected. For the past six months, Dana Rench has been practically living in bed - a bed without bedsheets. The 24-year-old works nights at Sushi Bin out at Remienko Regional Aerodrome...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Four days have passed since Deathcon 1 and glitter still litters Leah Greenbow's hair and chest. The leasing agent spoke candidly to The Advocate this morning after landing back in the Desert Capital early yesterday morning - just before work. While she conceded that her chipper mood yesterday might've given her the impression that she might've gotten...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The halcyon days of nightlife in Sydney is set to return after the incumbent NSW Government announced today that they've earmarked a parcel of land next to the Second Sydney Airport site at Badgerys Creek to build a dedicated nightlife district. The move comes after Gladys Berejiklian's government face criticism this morning after they elected to...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact "I'm as cunning as a shit house rat," he said. "So many of my friends have jumped into property ownership before they were ready. Struggling to pay a mortgage at record-low interest rates. Paying twice as much as they would've five years ago," "Idiots." Oliver Markson is a bright, young and 'cash-rich' city worker hellbent on creating...