Local News

NATHAN GALLAWAY | Street | Contact Cutting through the grounds of Betoota National University this morning, one local student on a walk of shame paused to ask himself what was so shameful about what he was doing. John Greenholm, a third-year philosophy student, went along to see the Turkish Drill Pressers last night at the Dolphin's Club and by all reports...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Once or twice a week, Miles Keith answers an unsolicited knock on the door. Only a handful of times, it's been a salesman. Last week, a Jehovah's Witness dropped by for a cup of tea and an Iced Vovo. Sadly, most of the time the Betoota Grove resident answers the door, it's somebody looking for drugs. "The look on their faces when...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Receiving the homebrewing kit for his birthday in August, one local waterproofer turned brewmaster got to sample his first batch this today after weeks of toil. And the results are in: it's the best beer he's ever tasted. Linden Monk took time out of his busy afternoon to talk to The Advocate about the process, sacrifice and personal hardship that...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A damning report into the local hospitality industry has outlined a number of shocking shortcomings - including the fact that nobody knows why each licensed premises in the wider Betoota area has a small television playing extreme sports clips on repeat. Peter Godwin, from the Office of Alcohol and Gaming, handed down his findings today to the local shire...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Once a Gurkha unsheathes his kukri, he must draw blood with it - even if it's his own. The same can be said for a bus driver. Once somebody pushed the stop button and the bus pulls over, somebody must get off. This morning on the D64 Express from Betoota Ponds to the Royal Zoological Park on...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local grandson has been distraught to learn that the blue tub in his nonna's freezer is actually just rock-frozen tomato sauce, not the neapolitan ice cream he was expecting. After being given free licence on his maternal grandmother's fridge, the 7-year-old went straight to the freezer to sauce for frozen treats that nonna sometimes buys after seeing...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Joe Cranston-MacDougall has carved his own groove in Australia, according to friends and family back home. The popular science student turned hospitality guru turned footballing actor has embraced Australian life like his very life depended on it. Rarely does he look back at old photos of the grey Aberdeen granite and wish he was back there...

SALLY POTTER | Local News | Contact Yet another cosmopolitan was sighed heavy into at Romano's Club last night as Molly Rawlins realised the man her friends set her up with is 'just another muggle.' Stopping short of declaring herself as a wizard, the 25-year-old finance worker said she uses the term 'muggle' to describe people that aren't like her and her...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Walking briskly this morning down Ulster Street to the Morris Road Metro Station in the fabled Old City District, Sally Dawkins casually rifled through her bag looking for her headphones for the ride to work. However, she didn't know that that today, she wouldn't be needed them. Jamming herself into the third-last carriage, the 29-year-old systems...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Have you ever dreamed about leaving this four-horse-town, trading the cosmopolitan late night cafe culture in Betoota's French Quarter district from the glitz and glamour of Hollywood? The director of a local acting school, Dennis Ridgeway, can help make those dreams a reality. For close to a decade now, Star Dreemz on Montague Street Betoota Grove,...