Studio Executives Gather To Decide Which Classic Movie They’ll Remake Next
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Move over original thought, there's a new, real moneymaker in town.
A number of leading local executives from a prominent South Betoota film studio have gathered today to decide which classic Australian film they're going to remake next.
The head-honchos from United Diamantina Projects have put together a presentation, showcasing a lexicon of timeless movies, that...
Local Unlucky Man Develops Common Cold During Common Heat Wave
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Despite taking every precaution, one North Betootanese accountant was forced to take a precious sick day today after coming down with the common cold after a weekend spent doing everything to his body to run it down.
The greater Diamantina Shire is currently experiencing a common heatwave, which makes Connor Townsend's diagnosis unusual.
"I can't believe I've got a cold,...
Local Sunday-Sessioner Under Impression He Got Away With It
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Atoning for Friday on Saturday is nothing compared to paying the price for Saturday on Sunday.
That's according to one local graphic designer, who threw caution to the wind over the weekend and drank Friday through Sunday night.
"I feel fine," said Gregor Redpath, a recent graduate of Collins Street Polytechnic in the Old City District.
"Which...
Office Tight-Arse Furious He Forgot To Sign Card For Present He Actually Put In For
DONNA HOLDEN | Culture | CONTACT
Michael Kelsen, 27, has been left kicking himself after forgetting to sign the card for a co-worker’s birthday gift which he contributed to.
An email was sent around Kelsen’s North Betoota property management office about the birthday gift being organised for one of his more senior co-worker’s 40th birthday.
After he read that it was a voluntary contribution,...
Great Night’s Sleep Marred By Local Man’s Hypercritical Internal Monologue
KEVIN DOUGLAS | Local News | Contact
Speaking to The Advocate through an artificial buzz that only a sleepless night and a quadruple shot flat white can give you, one local chicken farmer said his planned evening of rest was interrupted by his own sense of self-dissatisfaction.
Morin Heidelberg, a seventh-generation West Betootanese chicken farmer, said his current financial and social situations...
Man In New City Forced To Start Playing A Contact Sport Again To Make Friends
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Moving to a new city can be daunting, especially if it's work-related and to a place where you know nobody at all.
That's what happened to South Betoota-native, Morris Chambers, who was relocated by Santos late last month from his quite Californian Bungalow on the City's limits, to London.
Though he told The Advocate he was...
Hungover Teacher Decides Today Is Movie Day
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Two-for-one proseccos at the Dolphins Leagues Club last night got the better of a local Year 2 teacher, who decided today that her class was going to watch a movie - followed by some DEAR time.
Emma Roper, a popular primary teacher at South Betoota Public School, told The Advocate that she feels like ants...
Local Father Beginning To Realise The Bachelorette Is Indeed A Rich Tapestry Of Human Emotion
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Local father of four, Michael Collander, took time out of his busy Thursday morning to speak to The Advocate via telephone regarding The Bachelorette, which he's often forced to watch of an evening time.
While he describes himself as not being a fan of reality television or television in general, the 43-year-old told our reporters...
Report: Nobody Cares What’s In McNuggets, They Taste Like Heroin
CASHEW DURKIN | Food | Contact
As urban legends continue to swirl regarding the ingredients in McDonald's popular McNuggets, a recent study conducted by the CSIRO has declared that nobody really cares what's in them as they taste like the popular and addictive narcotic drug, heroin.
While the multinational purveyor of fine foods remains tight-lipped as to what's really in the...
18-Year-Old Buying A Bottle Of OP Rum Thinks His New Years Is Going To End Well
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Celebrations are heating up South Betoota and one local engineering student is getting ready to drink himself into a pair of handcuffs.
Walking past the bargain bin wines and other assorted brain varnishes down at the Cobb & Co Cellars on George Street, Elliot Stapleton explained to our reporters that he felt like treating himself tonight as he just...