Local News

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIn what can only be described as a significant yet debatable step toward personal growth, local woman Claire Brooks, 31, has announced that she has given up her notorious binge drinking habit in favour of a “slightly healthier” addiction. Claire, once known for her ability to turn a casual Friday night into a three-day bender, now spends her weekends...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA bloke who often faces criticism for enjoying ‘childish’ hobbies has today revealed that he’s actually very happy and well adjusted, and that everyone can quite frankly get stuffed. James Fowler, 32, an SEO specialist at One Pump Digital, admits that he’s used to copping a side eye from his workmates whenever he mentions his dorky hobbies, but to...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact It was meant to be a lazy Monday afternoon for local man Shane Bunting, who found himself shirtless on the couch with one hand down his pants, as ABC News 24 droned on in the background. At around noon, with a packet of uncooked San Remo Pumpkin & Ricotta Ravioli precariously balanced on a...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactLocal Anna Talbot has learned the hard way that the chances of copping a chatty Uber driver are almost 100% guaranteed if you’re violently hungover and trying to hold in vomit, which she experienced this morning after accidentally sleeping past her alarm. Speaking to The Advocate, Anna admits she’d been a bit silly on the sauce last night with...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Betoota Heights man Tom McGaynor made sure to pre-crack his knees before settling his 18-month-old daughter, Poppy, into her cot yesterday night. After successfully getting her to drift off during the typical 40-minute back-patting session, Tom remembered his hard-learned lesson from previous nights. The whip crack of a knee joint completely undoing all that effort. "I...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local woman has awoken to a feeling of terror this morning, having convinced herself that she must have uploaded some nudes to her instagram story while she was on the piss last night, it’s reported. Despite not having a single naked photo in her phone, Natalie Harbinger, 34 was certain her entire instagram following not only saw her...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTA local millennial woman has again reaffirmed that the kids are lost in the world of screens, despite spending a large portion of her childhood staring at a Tamagotchi.Sarah Doyle (34), was reminded how far the younger generation has fallen while having lunch at a family friendly pub earlier this week and looking at how many of the...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTA new study has revealed that even with the best marketing, originality and great taste, a hip new tea company will never be able to compete with a bushels tea made by an elderly white woman that watches Sky News religiously.The study surveyed dozens of brand new tea brands around the country, all of which promise amazing taste...

STACY OAKSHEAF | City News | CONTACTIn a never-ending game of social ping pong, Michelle Caulfield has once again sent her best mate Fiona Perez a restaurant they will, in all likelihood, never visit. “Omg, we need to go!” Michelle exclaimed, sharing a reel of “The Gilded Grape,” a swanky new wine bar in Betoota’s French Quarter,“the anchovies on toast look so good!” “Gorg, they...

CONSTANCE RIVERA | Editor | CONTACTIn an all-too-familiar scene, local woman Hayley Ryan has once again been forced to shove her meticulously planned meal prep into the freezer for the third consecutive night, following yet another spontaneous decision to dine out. The 26-year-old marketing coordinator, currently saving for her first home, had made a firm resolution to start meal prepping to save money and...