Sports

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Indian Cricket Team have received some encouraging words from Liberal Democrat Senator David Leyonhjelm this morning. The libertarian senator from NSW issued a statement this morning wishing all the 'young brown men' luck in the cricket today. "Good luck to the young brown men taking part in the test match down in Adelaide today, I hope that you enjoy...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some breaking news out of the river city of Brisbane, the names of the two men at the centre of yesterday afternoon's siege have been released by Queensland Police. The pair sent the city into lockdown yesterday after they became engaged in a tense 6-hour standoff with police and allegedly fired shots at law enforcement officials. In a sensational...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Darius Boyd has caused even more confusion at the South Sydney Rabbitohs organisation today. After the resolution of an extremely poorly managed and confusing coaching situation (which saw Wayne Bennett and Anthony Siebold finally do the coach swap), the Brisbane contracted Darius Boyd has further muddied the waters. The Broncos fullback and apple of Wayne Bennett's eye caused the furrowed...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The country has let out a collective sigh of exasperation this evening, as it prepares for the boxing match that was apparently supposed to capture the imagination of a nation. As a few people around the country prepare for 'The River Side Rumble,' the bout will see Anthony 'The Man' Mundine and Jeff 'The Hornet' Horn go head...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Michael Clarke-Gerard Whateley feud has escalated this afternoon, with the former Australian Captain firing off a stern warning. Clarke sent Whateley the strongest message yet, by heading down to his local barber this afternoon and asking him to fire up the frosted tips. "If this pen pushing journo whose never played a game of cricket for his country wants...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The nation's peak rugby union body has announced this morning that they're on the lookout for a coach who will fix the myriad of cultural, structural and social problems that have plagued the organisation in recent years. Under-siege Wallabies coach Micheal Cheika was all but guaranteed his job until next year's World Cup but as...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Prime Minister Scott Morrison has today done his part to make sure there is no bad blood between himself and departing Liberal MP Julia Banks. After spending the afternoon tossing up what would be the best way to say he's sorry, Morrison decided to drive down to one of those big department stores his missus is always banging...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australian rugby captain Michael 'Micky The Bull' Hooper is today grappling with the toughest decision of them all. That is, whether or not he snitches on Wallabies veteran and teammate David Pocock, who has reportedly been reading The Guardian news reports after the 11pm lights out. Pocock, who has a habit of reading as much climate science research as...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Parramatta Eels are facing the wrath of Sydneysiders today after being revealed as the cause of the dust storm sweeping over the city this afternoon. While meteorologists originally thought the dust storm may have come from the Western region of the state, The Betoota Advocate can reveal that they the blanket of dust has come from the Parramatta Eels trophy cabinet. Aside...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact National Rugby League follower and lifelong Canberra Raiders supporter Justin Gillespie (28) stated he will be taking a break from discussing NRL during the off-season to delve into other conspiracy theories instead. After seeing his team finish in the concession free top ten in 2018, Gillespie stated the secret NRL plot to keep his team out of finals football...