Sports

Australian tennis “Fanatics” accidentally cheer for 55th-ranked Portuguese player

28 January, 2015. 19:30 JACO VAN DER MERWE | Cricket | Contact Australian Supporters group, FANATICS have been left completely red-faced after showing their support for the wrong person at the Australian Open. The FANATICS, who are well known throughout Australian sport, stumbled across a match where they were meant to get behind Aussie, Jordan Thompson. Instead, the FANATICS were left cheering for 55th ranked...

Kyrgios Vows To Debut An Even Shitter Haircut Against Murray

27 January, 2015. 15:30 IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Journalist | CONTACT A DAZZLING array of skills. A stunning vocabulary of curse words. The shittest haircut in the world. This is the new face of Australian Tennis The world’s tennis media is fascinated with Nick Kyrgios and his charge into the Australian Open quarter-finals. Nick McCarvel, writing for USA Today, said succinctly: “Australia has a new...

Australian Mens Cricketers Urged To Follow Ellyse Perry’s Lead And Get A Second Job

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia's mens cricket side have been today advised to follow the lead of less-self-important Australian athletes and get a second job, that's if they want to be on the same pay grade as Australia's highest paid cricketer, Ellyse Perry. The Australian mens cricketers will boycott an Australia A tour of South Africa unless Cricket Australia...

ICC rules West Indies to be renamed “Caribbean United National Team”

21 January, 2015. 12:30 IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Journalist | Contact It's a decision that has been dubbed "Outrageous" by former great Brian Lara: The Indian-dominated International Cricket Committee (ICC) has ruled that the international cricketing side known as the West Indies will now be referred to as "The Caribbean" for the upcoming ICC World Cup. In a shock move, the governing body deemed...

“Boof used to do this shit all the time”- What else did Warner say?

2o January, 2015. 11:30 IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Journalist | Contact Explosive Australian opener David Warner on Monday defended a heated on-field exchange with Indian batsman Rohit Sharma in which he demanded the Indian cricketer "speak English" Warner said the verbal exchange at a one-day international at the Melbourne Cricket Ground on Sunday earned him a fine of 50 percent of his match...

“Pissing in my own mouth was a victimless crime” – Is Todd Carney the NRL scapegoat?

19 January, 2015. 15:37 IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Journalist | Contact In the last few weeks we have seen a rise in the number of current, former and returning NRL players to be involved in the world of crime. Drug Trafficking (Former Players Jason Smith, Matt Seers), Drug Manufacturing (returning player, Danny Wicks) and Grievous Bodily Harm (Russel Packer, signed to St George while in...

WORLD CUP TURMOIL: ICC threaten to disqualify England from Cricket World Cup

17 January, 2015. 15:30 JACO VAN DER MERWE | Cricket | Contact The ICC has confirmed that England is under investigation and could risk disqualification from the upcoming World Cup after a dramatic change in the international qualification laws. The Betoota Advocate can exclusively report that the ICC are “sick and tired” of the England and Wales Cricket Board (ECB) constantly “exploiting the rules”...

IOC confirms 3-on-3 basketball to be trialled at 2016 Rio Olympics

14 January, 2015. 15:00 IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Journalist | Contact After decades of pressure and debate, as well as an official application submitted by the International Basketball Federation, the IOC have this week confirmed that a three-men-a-side basketball variant will be included as a part of the official event program for the 2016 Olympics in Rio de Janeiro. The final decision was made quietly during...

Bionic Shark: Greg Norman returns to golf with prosthetic arm

12 January, 2015. 15:00 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact GREG Norman has returned to the golf course for the first time since his chainsaw accident. In September last year, Norman injured his left hand with the power tool as he trimmed a tree in his Los Angeles garden. However, The Daily Mail revealed in December that Norman had in fact lost his hand due to...

Pop Discovers All Of His Sporting Heroes Are Muslims

IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Journalist | [email protected] It was a shock discovery for the 79-year old self-confessed “sports nut” Alan Starkey over the weekend, during an annual family brunch celebrating his wife Irene’s 75th Birthday. A heated discussion around the dining room table at Mr Starkey’s South Betoota residence on Sunday morning resulted in the former boxer and junior Rugby League coach...

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