The Nation

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In terrific news for the property developer billionaires that are facing industrial disputes with their workers on the jobsites of high-rise luxury apartment and major government infrastructure builds, it appears that the allegations are true! It can today be confirmed that the pesky construction arm of the CFMEU are Australia's modern day equivalent of the Sicilian Mafia that dominated...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTA local online financial coach who spent most of 2021 proselytizing the epic rise of NFT's is now wondering if you'd be interested in buying his online money-making course. Vincent Fiducia (30), prides himself on being on the cutting edge of money making schemes that take little to no effort, while also being generous enough to share it with...

KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACTThe main street of Betoota will be covered in a sea of floppy straw hats this weekend as our town welcomes the arrival of a new wine and cheese festival. The influx of wide brim comes as ‘Mould’, a swanky artisan cheese festival arrives much to the delight of local beauticians and women called “Nicole”. After stopping through...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTIn a baffling turn of events, local mum Patricia Thompson (58) , who has conquered all 17,090 levels of Candy Crush, still struggles with some of the basic functions of her smartphone. Despite her unshakable dedication to Candy Crush Saga, one of the few apps installed on her phone , Patricia often calls her son for help with a...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTDanilo Mendoza (28) has awkwardly forgotten to mention to a mate that a decent portion of his apartment is taken up by his mammoth footwear collection. The encounter began when Danilo invited one of his friends from Thursday night basketball over to his place to enjoy his mum's leftover chicken adobo. Like any honest Filipino man, Danilo takes extreme pride...

KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACTA succulent serving of schadenfreude has been dished up to Betoota Ponds man this week after he got a little too cocky about his immune system. Craig Dunstan, a 33-year-old tiler, has all winter been bragging to his mates about his ability to dodge the flu, a topic he’s gloated about since May. Such was his confidence that...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the Paris Olympics get underway, Queenslanders are still unsure of where in the fuck we are going to be hosting tourists and athletes from every single country in the world when it's Brisbane's turn to host the 2032 games. With only eight years to go under the Olympic flame arrives in Brisbane, the preparations have become a political...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA group of mouth breathers attempting to carb load their way out of hangover have found themselves reaching a stalemate today, while dining at Betoota Ponds most beloved chinese restaurant ‘Kings on King.’ Only speaking to ask if someone could pass a plate, the boys were clearly on struggle street as they attempted to shovel various bits of animal...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The 2024 Paris Olympics are finally here! After years of build up and anticipation the Games of the XXXIII Olympiad have arrived. And that means a bumper few weeks ahead for sports fanatics, arm chair enthusiasts and even the most sports agnostic people - who always seem to find a way to enjoy the Games whether it's through...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Crossfit member from a gym in the French Quarter has been rushed to hospital this morning showing signs of respiratory distress, making him the 12th man to be admitted for Crossfit induced illnesses this month alone. Paramedics at the Betoota Base Hospital report seeing an influx of these types of cases every year, as Crossfitters continue to workout...