The Nation

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As the fallout continues from the Prime Minister's ill-advised property purchase on the Cenny Coast, the nation's Opposition leader has today confirmed that he's keeping his head down. "Yeah, gonna let the foot soldiers fire shots at Albo on this one," laughed Peter Dutton. "Not popping my chrome dome up to invite pot-shots about my 400 million...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Residents of the southern hemisphere's largest open air sewer are being asked by health authorities to resist the incredible urge to chop up and snort a mystery substance that's washed up on a city beach. Coogee, known for being the 33rd Irish Country and the place where a disgruntled chef once took a shit in...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Betoota Ponds moggy has finally come out from their hiding place this morning, having spent the entire night ignoring his owner’s cries of distress as she desperately tried to find him. Unlike a dog, who would instantly come running at the sound of their name, ‘Spoons’ tends to only respond when he figures there’s something in it for...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTLocal woman Amy Matthews (24) recently started a new office job and is not surprised at all that the off-putting annoying guy in the office happens to be a die hard Doctor Who fan. Early signs of the devastating realisation started on her first morning in the office, a loud echo could be heard coming from the office kitchen. "Gary...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A woman who reckons she’s been ‘cursed’ when it comes to dating has been told to have a good look at the type of blokes she keeps going for, which likely have something to do with her being chronically single, it’s reported. Taylor Hughes, 27, is alleged to have been having a whinge to her long suffering best friend...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local bloke stands accused of having some warped priorities day, as it’s discovered he cares a lot more about maintaining lawn stripes than doing standard household chores like making the bed once in a while. Having recently purchased a small two bedroom home in the outer ridges of Betoota ponds with his wife Sarah, Steven Fortunati, 36, has...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT With the manipulated Australian property market out of reach for anyone trying to pull themselves up by their boot straps, and wage growth stalling for decades, The nation's economic divide is not lost on anyone but the wealth-hoarding boomers who once called themselves HoWarD's BaTtLeRs. Those Australians who came of age in the years after military conscription was discontinued...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Opposition leader Peter Dutton is starting to think he might've bitten off more than he chew this week, after hard-launching his new Jew-Friendly rebrand in the Teal seats down south. As a multimillionaire property developer from North Brisbane's mortgage belt, the most diverse voters that Dutton has previously had to engage with over his 20 years in Federal Politics...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Tech entrepreneur and part-time corporate raider Michael (Mike) Cannon-Brookes is building the world's tallest wooden structure in Sydney to put his company, Atlassian, in. Though wood is an outdated and inferior building product, Mr Cannon-Brookes told The Advocate it's all that he, and Atlassian, can afford at the moment. "I don't expect a humble newspaper editor-at-large,...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local Brisbane man Ken Moore (29) is letting the dogs out this weekend. It's not exactly a bucks - but all the boys are going to be in town for a mate's engagement party. With the event scheduled to start at an inner-city bowls club at midday - the wives and girlfriends understand the significance of the occasion. That...