Future Of Human Race Now Solely Dependant On Disengaged White People
23 June, 2016 11:30
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
With three Western world economies making their way to the polls in 2016, it appears that the future of planet Earth is resting on the opinions of a trans-national community of people who would much prefer to watch reality television than the news.
While Great Britain decided earlier this year that they would like to leave the...
Bernard Fanning, Wally Lewis Join Long List Of Queenslanders Calling For A “Quexit”
21 June, 2016 13:40
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Former frontman of Powderfinger, Bernard Fanning, and Queensland rugby league icon Wally Lewis are the latest high-profile Queenslanders to lend their support to the growing "Quexit" movement - it has been confirmed.
Speaking to fellow 'Quexit' ambassador, Karl Stefanovic, on the Channel Nine TODAY show this morning, both men (dressed in knee-length shorts and boat...
World’s largest nuclear arsenal to be controlled by menopausal woman or Hillary Clinton
6 June, 2016. 13:45
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
THE HEARTS OF HIPSTERS and perverts around the world are filled with pangs of sadness this afternoon as Hillary Clinton officially won the Democratic nomination in California.
Capitulating like a Bangladeshi cricket team, Bernie Sanders is refusing to give in until the very last moment - even though he's on track to...
Joe Hockey responds to budget by throwing television off embassy balcony
4 May, 2016. 15:34
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
IN A RARE LAPSE OF judgement, former treasurer turned ambassador Joe Hockey was seen throwing a television off a fourth story balcony yesterday as Scott Morrison delivered his first address on the nation's chequebook.
The Dick Smith brand 52-inch plasma was about to receive a National Heritage seal for being an exceptionally...
Lebanese Authorities Don’t Seem To Understand Tara Brown Is Kind Of A Big Deal
10 April, 2016. 13:15
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Following a bungled child snatch in Lebanon, a 60 Minutes crew and the mother at the centre of at trans-national custody battle, are spending their third night behind bars, as Australian diplomats work for their release.
However, what the Lebanese authorities don't seem to understand is that one member of the Australian investigative...
WOW! This Filthy Tap In The Slums Of Mumbai The Key To Instant Weight Loss
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
After amazing success in the UK, North America and Canada, the most effective new weight loss craze is finally making its way to Australia!
Everyone seems to be talking about Dharavi Tap Water Program! (also known as Spitty Bum Fat Burner) - It is said to be a “Dual Action Fat Buster” that suppresses appetite and prevents fat from...
Shannon Noll Linked To Panama Papers Money Laundering Scandal
6 April, 2016. 10:30
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
2003 Australian Idol runner-up, Shannon Noll is believed to be hiding out at his family farm in Condobolin today, after leaked tax documents known as the Panama Papers revealed accusations that he and his wife used an offshore firm to allegedly hide million-dollar investments.
The unprecedented leak of more than 11 million documents from...
Reclaim Australia Endorses Hillary Clinton For President Of The World
5 April, 2016. 18:15
PADDY MUNRO | Contributor | CONTACT
In a surprise move, local patriot Daryn Lynch passionately defended his support for US presidential candidate Hillary Clinton at the Pastorla Hotel last night.
The Reclaim Australia member had previously announced support for republican front-runner Donald Trump, but last night changed sides after learning of Clinton’s unimpeachable record of bullying Muslims.
“Mate I love trump’s wall idea, we...
Historians Agree Captain Cook Arrived With Carton Of Piss, Keen To Make Friends
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
After realising that Australian politics was missing his wildly unhelpful input, Home Affairs Minister Peter Dutton has returned to breakfast television with another hot take about the opinion of an uppity female professional.
Dutton has joined a chorus of relevance-deficient conservatives condemning Victoria's Deputy Chief Health Officer Annaliese van Diemen for her comparisons of Captain Cook's arrival on Australian shores...
Waleed Aly To Deliver Introspective Monologue Through Belgian Flag Filter Tonight
23 March, 2016. 11:34
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
IN RESPONSE TO THE RECENT terrorist bombings in Brussels, Waleed Aly has announced his intention to deliver his opening monologue tonight on The Project through a Belgian flag filter.
The 37-year-old television personality is often the voice of reason when terror takes hold around the world. His impartiality and careful explanation of...
