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There have been renewed calls from within the deplorables faction of the Liberal Party to defund the ABC today, after yet another news special presented the Federal Government in an unflattering light.

Leigh Sales’ special interview with former Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull on 7:30 seems to have struck a cord with the party, particularly those whose own political ambitions were damaged by the post-2018 Liberal Party brain drain.

Much like the their exposès into the Murray Darling water theft, the pre-election sports rorts, the influence of the Hillsong Church over Australian diplomacy, the coverage of the catastrophic bleaching events in the Great Barrier Reef, and of course the government’s pathetic response to the 2019 bushfires – last night’s episode of ABC 7:30 has seen the Liberal Party revisit their 2018 plan to defund the public broadcaster and sell it off.

As the only Australian journalists that are paid a liveable wage, it seems that ABC reporters don’t have to work very hard to uncover endless troves of blatant corruption and treasonous abuses of power in the Liberal Party.

However, it’s the fact that they are even looking for those abuses of power that has put them on shaky ground with the coalition.

One political swamp-dweller, Hugo Hopscotch-Cartwheel (28) says it’s bad enough that commercial media can’t compete with the ABC for localised news, but for the government to constantly have to answer to journalists is exactly what the Labor Party wants.

As a smooth-palmed Bond Uni law graduate turned-chief-of-staff-for-some-nameless-suburban-cunt-on-the-back-bench, Hugo says it is not the government’s responsibility to provide the news. Unless they are doing it through Daily Telegraph political editor Simon Benson, who used to visit Peta Credlin’s office at 3pm every afternoon to find out what the following day’s front page was.

“Personally, last night was the last straw. The ABC are biased” says Hugo, who hasn’t had a root since he went to Manila for his 2010 Schoolies Week.

“Having our former leader on last night to discuss his times as the leader, just shows their leftist agenda”

Turnbull’s unbelievable admissions have made headlines today, as the former PM hinted to the fact that perhaps Rupert Murdoch and several prominent coal mining magnates are in control of the Australian government, and not the six or seven nameless Pentecostal climate-skeptics that currently make up The Prime Minister’s Cabinet.

Hugo views this as unhelpful to the Liberal Party’s greater cause, which is to remain in power for as long as possible, by any means possible.

“Aside from their emergency radio broadcasts during the bushfires, the ABC could be sold off and no one would miss it” he chuckles, in a phlegmy incel kind of way.

“Channel 9 provides completely adequate coverage of the current pandemic, plus they actually broadcast content that Australians enjoy, like the dating shows and the sports games”

“Australians don’t need Dr Norman Swan patronising them. If I had my way he’d be getting the Annika Smethurst treatment.”

MORE TO COME.

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