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Prime Minister Anthony Albanese has finally been exposed for what he is. A political elite.
This comes after his secret ‘other life’ as a world leader who gets to live in a nice house and fly in business class was exposed by Australia’s meticulous and unflinching media.
Many journalists and political opponents have described it as ‘his Hawaii moment.
And they would be correct. Albanese’s purchase of a house that costs twice as much as the average Sydney voter’s house is enough to lose him an election. In fact, it is equally as bad as the time Prime Minister Scott Morrison went to Hawaii for a two week beach holiday in the middle of record-breaking bushfires, and then lied to the media by denying he’d ever left the country, until he was caught out lying because he couldn’t resist getting a photo with some Aussie tourists on Waikiki beach at sunset, forcing him to admit he had fled the country, but defended his decision by first blaming his wife and kids, and then eventually losing his temper and saying ‘I don’t hold a hose mate!’ before promising he would come back as soon as could be arranged, which ended up being a week later, because he felt that he deserved the luxury of finishing his overseas holiday while 483 people died and over 4000 people lost their homes.
Some would say it’s even worse.
His sob story about growing up in council housing with a single mother who championed education and helping other people has always been fishy. We at the Australian media have never believed that people like that ever existed.
And now we know for a fact they don’t. Anthony Albanese is a grifter!
First it was his decadent decision to have not one but TWO marriages. Talk about entitlement. Only a privileged political elite would think that he deserved another chance at finding love after his first marriage ended.
This was followed closely by his decision to buy a house that costs twice as much as the average house in his home city. What kind of money are these world leaders making where they can afford to own a house two hours away from the CBD with four bedrooms? It would be depressing if it wasn’t hilarious.
Many will argue that Albanese and his new wife have worked as top-level diplomats and public servants their entire lives, and have no financial dependents, and actually need to retire in a house that is big enough to be surveilled by the Australian Federal Police. But that doesn’t change the fact that Australians don’t get to live in a house as nice as he does. Talk about tone deaf.
All of this would have been hidden from the public, if not for the tireless work from the brave journalists and Nine Newspapers and NewsCorp, who have diligently reported on every single thing that is now different in his life compared to when he was a povo wog kid in the housos.
If Albanese has any chance of salvaging his political career, he must absolutely reject the financial emancipation he has experienced by becoming Prime Minister. Here’s 7 lifestyle changes that he can make to prove he doesn’t think he’s better than us.
1. TRANSPORT
The Commonwealth cars and private vehicles. It’s all just far too out of touch with reality. Albanese could easily save money by fare evading on the 423 bus from Marrickville. Would it be that hard for him to hop in through the back door during peak hours like the rest of us?
2. SPORT
Relishing in corporate boxes at sporting events is for the royal family—not for someone from Camperdown. Albanese should stick to his roots, and watch the Newtown Jets at the NSW Cup away games with everyone else that has been priced out of the inner-west. Surely his darling Rabbitohs would appreciate an extra pair of eyeballs scouting for some untapped Polynesian talent.
3. SECURITY
Hey! How about, instead of ripping off the taxpayer for some fancy ear-piece security detail, Albanese could just call up his Viet mate and ask if his two uncles who grew up in early 1990s Sydney can follow him around all day? It wouldn’t cost much. Just a tank of fuel for the WRX and shout them a feed down Illawarra Road.
4. INTERSTATE TRAVEL
No more private jets and favours from QANTAS, the PM must exclusively travel via Greyhound Bus to Canberra. He could catch Murray’s bus, but that’s still a bit too fancy. The Greyhound is cheaper because it stops in Goulburn to pick up recently released prisoners and the deadbeats who got kicked out of the NSW Police Academy.
5. LOVE
Who does this guy think he is, having two marriages? George Clooney? He should just get divorced and develop a pornography addiction like normal divorcees. Why does he deserve a second shot at love? It’s pure political class entitlement.
6. HOME
Not only has this guy helped gentrify the neighborhood he grew up in, but he’s also bought a beach house. What kind of Australian buys a beach house at 60 years of age? The only way that Albanese can prove he hasn’t gotten too big for his boots is to sell both his Marrickville residence and the Central Coast nest egg, and move back into the public housing flat he grew up in.
7. SOCIAL LIFE
Instead of attending Parliament’s fancy Midwinter Ball in a thousand-dollar suit, Albanese could instead socialise at the Ημέρα Ανεξαρτησίας της Κύπρου celebrations down at the local Cypriot club. Could he even handle an afternoon on the ouzo with us plebs? Or is Cyprus Independence Day not political enough for him?
