CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
With severe rainfall expected across the eastern states over the next week, travellers can expect another wave of cancelled and delayed flights.
However, it seems that passengers are more than happy to accept weather events as a good enough reason for flight schedules to be disrupted. It’s when flights are cancelled for no reason that remains the most frustrating aspect of modern air travel in Australia.
With Australian airlines still struggling to get back to their pre-pandemic proficiencies, it is generally accept that a half hour delay is the best case scenario for any commercial flight in 2024.
However, it seems that some of these delays may be intentionally, after it can be revealed that boutique kaftan retailer CAMILLA has partnered with Qantas – in a long-awaited collaboration between the two iconic Australian institutions.
Known for designs so colourful they could blind ya, Camilla is targeted to a specific demographic of cashed up Gen-X party girls and millennial gay men. In recent years, the brand has evolved beyond the long lunch kaftans and found success in a line of mens resortwear.
It’s for this reason that Qantas has been allegedly delaying all flights to Noosa and Cairns by half an hour, in a commercial arrangement that aims to create a temporary sense of restlessness amongst holidayers that are en route to Port Douglas and Hastings Street.
“With Camilla outlets now situated in almost all major domestic airports, this arrangement with Qantas has seen a nearly 900% spike in impulse purchases” says a Camilla spokesman.
“And for every airport purchase, there’s at least two delayed purchases at the central Noosa and Cairns outlets that take place when the passengers finally land after regretting not getting a new kaftan while they were waiting the gruelling thirty minutes before departure”
“This is a match made in heaven. Qantas goes with Camilla like Camilla goes with a magnum of chilled rosè and some pork belly skewers”
Qantas has been approached for comment, however the airline’s PR machine has staunchly denied any claims that they would intentionally delay or cancel flights in an effort to make more money for their shareholders or commercial partners of any variety because that kind of unethical conduct simply goes against everything the Flying Kangaroo stands for.
