CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
A local man has today discovered what his cousins have been doing every second Christmas.
Sam Shearer (30) had always assumed he was the main character in his cousin Simon’s extended family. But as of several minutes ago, he’s learnt that is definitely not be the case.
Because today is day 1 of Simon’s bucks party, and all of the men that have seen him at his drunkest are here. Including the ‘cousins from the other side’.
Sam had never actually thought about the fact that maybe Simon had some relatives through his mum’s side of the family.
The fact that they both share the same last name means that Sam was able to comfortably assume that Simon Shearer was only related to Shearers.
This isn’t the case. Simon’s mum has like three sisters. All of them have sons around his age. That means there’s like three different subcategories of ‘cousins from the other side’ at this bucks. They all have different surnames. That means three parallel universes that Sam had never once contemplated.
And what’s worse. These cousins are great blokes. Really fun guys. Absolute classics.
As the beers keep flowing throughout the day 1 festivities, Sam is starting to wonder why Simon would ever want to spend Christmas with his side of the family.
“Are we the lame cousins?” asks Sam, to himself.
“I feel like these would be the guys you wanna spend two weeks with over Christmas. Not us.”
Sam is still grappling with all of this new information as he gets introduced to the Bozza, Simon’s best mate from work.
He sees Timmy, Simon’s best friend from high school glare.
