LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
After starting the 2021 State of Origin series with a convincing 50-6 win, coach of the NSW Blues Brad Fittler has stated that his team still have a lot to prepare before Game II at Suncorp Stadium.
According to Freddie, beach sprints are taking a backseat as Blues ‘great’ Paul Gallen dropped by the NSW camp to give the boys some tips on how to deal with Scotty wanting a photo, now that he knows they are capable of winning and are therefore worth aligning himself with publicly.
Best known as the current Prime Minister of Australia, Scotty from Marketing is also known as an alleged die-hard Cronulla Sharks supporter and is Sharks season ticket holder Number 1, dethroning some poor bugger who probably actually watches the games and knows who ET is.
Proving he is exactly like The Common Man, Mr Morrison has since been seen pretending to enjoy footy on several occasions but mostly only when his team is winning.
Earlier this year, Mr Morrison even visited the Parramatta Eels change room after they beat his Sharks for reasons unknown to even the News Corp shareholders who actually run the country.
As a former Sharks and NSW captain, Paul Gallen is well versed in dealing with the dubious Scotty From Marketing and shared his best learnings with the young gun NSW side.
“If you’re not sure what to do, just laugh,” said Gal, pointing to a diagram showing how ScoMo can move through a room tactically avoiding every single woman.
“Just shake his hand and let him move on and don’t be freaked out by the texture and temperature of his hand like I was the first time. Practice with a chicken breast at home if you can.”
“Also, if he wants a selfie with you you’ll have to switch the camera so it faces you. Otherwise he doesn’t understand what’s happening and just starts yelling ‘where am I?’”
“Also make sure you don’t accidentally touch cheeks with him during the selfie. It makes him panic to get that intimate with another man, and he starts praying”
MORE TO COME.
