TRACEY BENDINGER | Social Nuances | Contact
The latest update to Apple’s hotly anticipated iPhone Xs has today been leaked and, Bondi, you better get ski goggles out because it’s about to start snowing.
The Advocate can confirm that the new iPhone is to come with what’s basically a razor blade and straw, however only the Bondi retailer will receive the model with these add-ons.
Apple is yet to confirm the rumours, however, a source from a local telco retailer has assured us that these innovations are one hundred per-cent real.
“I wouldn’t put it as crudely as a razor blade and straw, we’ve spent months perfecting the aluminium blade and cylinder – they’re designed to withstand moisture penetration and breakages.”
“We’re are always looking for ways to improve our users experience and get an edge over the competition.”
“We know that people use their phones as a platform for cocaine, so this add on just streamline’s the process for our customers – which is one of our founding principles”
When questioned on why it was only Bondi retailers receiving the model, the source further revealed plans
“It’s only Bondi for now, our research shows that’s where the highest volume of cocaine is consumed”
“We’re looking to roll it out at Betoota Old City outlet as Betoota has the highest number of media employees – with the silly season coming up we predict there’ll be a lot of execs looking to powder their noses.”
The Advocate is yet to hear how much the device will cost, but we understand certain retailers are forming a partnership with local dealers and is willing to let customers purchase the phone on tick if they get an 8 ball in the same transaction.
More to come.
