CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
The Holy matrimony of popular Betoota power couple, Andrew Scali and Becky Latham has today resulted in another kick in the arse for the single cousins who are not yet reaching life milestones as fast as today’s bride.
Becky, who has a sweet job that takes her around the world selling heavily marked up soap products to rich Asian people, and will probably be giving birth to a pair of cute twin daughters in like 10 months, has already made life hard enough for the much more relaxed bachelorettes in extended family.
With Gran and the aunties already heckling the single cousins for not bringing a date to the wedding, the newlywed couple take it just that little bit further by designating a long list of speeches and bridal party duties to a bunch of the hottest single guys in North East Betoota.
Namely, the best man. Dane.
Just on face value, Dane is already generating whispers from the older girls, who can’t believe he’s single.
On top of that, it is later revealed that he’s also a well-paid CEO of a prominent diving school at Betoota Lake.
As Dane gets up to make his Best Man’s speech, it appears Becky has stitched up every one of her single relatives in a big way. He’s also funny… and not in the obnoxious and crass way that most best mans usually are.
After confirming that he is indeed the whole package. Dane’s hunky demeanour and razor wit has now got the aunties fired up, with a lot of stares being shot to the younger nieces, followed by head jerks towards the lectern.
In fact, Dane’s speech is so funny that he’s even got a few of the uncles considering turning gay and asking him to turn gay as well.
His opening crack about thanking the father of the Bride for ‘cumming’ has the entire party in stitches. A classic one liner that will be repeated for the rest of time.
“How fucken funny was the Best Man!?” says every single dad at the party.
“Handsome too” says every single aunty, while machine-gun-firing stares at the lonely losers who came without a man.
“Apparently he’s single. Kelly should go and ask Becky if they can swap seats so she can sit near him”
